Friday, June 5, 2015

My mother-in-law moved in without consulting me, please help me!

Good morning aunty  Amara, I celebrate you ma!
This is my very first post ma.i have a challenge,need your wise counsel ma. 
My fiancé got a 3-bedroom flat in preparation of our wedding coming up July 4th 2015,We made plans already on how to go about our lives.
Three week back, he informed me that his mother insisted she will stay with us, thinking it was a joke,playfully I said no problem.
Aunty Amara to my greatest surprise my mother in-law moved into the house on Monday 1st June, she didn't even consult me, funny enough her daughter is in support of it,my fiancĂ© is the last and youngest ...my family  can't stand it especially my mum.
I don't really have a problem with my mother in-law but she should have given me the honour to enjoy my honeymoon at least for a period of time .
Aunty please help me I'm losing it! Dear sender,
The best person who you should have discussed this with or who should have consulted you wasn't your mother-in-law but your fiance which I feel he did but you thought it to be a joke.
I may not also know the circumstances in his family which has prompted your man to make such sacrifice at this critical moment of his journey.
However, I will encourage you not to lose hope nor give up because of this development.
Discuss in details with your husband and find out ways to help him sort this out.
Do not in anyway try to demand this as your right this is because in the battle of supremacy, most men will always chose their mum to their wife.
Suggest to him options he can adopt to make things easier on you and on your young family.
Extend your love to your mother-in-law and be kind to her.
Treat her the way you would have treated your mum should she have been the lady who have come to join you in your home.
Give her the respect and the courtesy that she deserves and avoid any clash no matter who was wrong.
This is your journey and your marriage, while it may not be the very best decisions for your young family, you do not need to let the opinions of others make you take a decision that you may regret later in life.
You only need the wisdom, maturity, understanding and love to overcome this test of your love for him.
Take everything to God in prayers and pour your heart on him.
Allow God to guide your steps and do not relent in trusting in his promises for you and your home.
I am hopeful that this would be a blessing for you in the end.

6 comments:

  1. Your fiance told you but you took it to be a joke, so next time always take him seriously, at the same time I have to also blame him for not telling you the exact date his mom will be coming, the mother is there already, so please learn to live with her, and never show her any grudge...if your fiance is rich enough, you guys can travel out for your honey moon, but if he's not, then manage with him, your mother in law cannot live with you forever she will still leave, but please treat her with all level of respect as you will treat and respect your own mom, while she's living with you. #enoughsaid

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  2. Observe n understand her very well,n both of u wil live happily as mother n daughter

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  3. Did u say she is living with u guys or on holiday? Wow!!! This is a very huge challenge cos u've not even ventured into marriage . Pls see it as a temptation and learn to manage it. We all have a cross to bear in our various marriages.

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  4. Did u say she is living with u guys or on holiday? Wow!!! This is a very huge challenge cos u've not even ventured into marriage . Pls see it as a temptation and learn to manage it. We all have a cross to bear in our various marriages.

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  5. I can't take such rubbish,Gosh! The marriage is too young to start experiencing such thing. A good and reasonable mum in law won't do such a thing. My dear,open your eyes well oo cos that woman is in for something that you won't even stand to face.

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  6. Your man told you, you taught he was joking, r u serious now ?? Is he a comedian, please find a way to adjust cos u were informed and you said No Problem, dont find problem now

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