Friday, September 4, 2015

Should I Be With Him Out of Pity?

Good day ma, Aunty please is it wrong for you to work out on a relationship when you feel things are not working out well irrespective of the hurt you cause your partner?
I have a man who wants to date me and probably marry me but he has someone he had dated for six years but according to him distance and some other things have been the problem but they were managing up till now, but he just want to stop pitying her and face the fact that they are not compatible and move on.
   
Me too I have been in a relationship for three years but everything look stagnant, am just tired of the whole thing, I feel am just caged in one place.
My Guy can stay for a year without us seeing each other and he is not bordered. I feel like am in prison.
Am just pitying leaving him but am no longer happy maybe he is not ready.

SO AUNTY IF A RELATIONSHIP IS NOT WORKING CAN ONE JUST LEAVE INSTEAD OF PITYING THE OTHER PERSON AND MANAGING THE WHOLE THING?
Thanks, I await you reply in my mail.

It is emotionally unhealthy to be in a relationship out of pity for the other partner, it negates every intention or vision that the relationship represents. 
Instead of managing an already failed relationship with no purpose, consideration, mutual commitment and constant communication between the partners, it is wiser to be honest with yourself and quit the relationship. 
However I must not fail to add that while you have every right to who you choose to date, it wouldn't be nice if at the end of the day you it seems as though you are looking for a relationship of convenience instead of giving your heart to building the kind of relationship that you desire. 
While it may seem as though this current man has prospects for you, there's every possibility that he may leave you should his girlfriend returns with some good excuses thereby making you look like a stop gap between him and his girlfriend. 
Please seek the face of God and be convinced before taking any decision to avoid flying from the frying pan into hell fire. 
All the best dear. 

2 comments:

  1. Just like Aunty said make sure he is not using as a stop gap between him and his girl friend, and before u move on to this new guy please try and discuss with ur present and officially end the relationship. All the best

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  2. Please,a Relationship actually BEGINS after a marriage proposal has been given and accepted,with wedding plans underway. Until then,you don't become exclusive with anybody. It is VERY WRONG to go into a man's life to pray and hope for a marriage proposal. You enter after you have accepted his marriage proposal to harmonise your Values,Beliefs,Goals,and Plans,and then,fix your wedding. Never allow any man to put your life on hold. All these girlfriend/boyfriend thing is ungodly,and a violation of God's original design for relationships. It is a product of foolishness,calculated to waste your life. As long as people practice it,it will keep wrecking lives. Please,untangle yourself from it as fast as you can. Go and learn the right sequence for Relationship,and stop wasting your life. Life is not waiting for anybody.

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