Thursday, October 8, 2015

Should I Marry a Widow?

Thank you so much for your good works. Please, I need some advice and would like your personal response. . 
I am in love with a widow with two kids (Boys). . I'm 31 years while she is 33 years old. . I knew she was a widow before I asked her out but I didn't know that she was older than me. She is slim while I'm fleshy. . She is so unique, so special, so wonderful. . 
We love each other so much and loving her is life to me but of course we have our little challenges which I would like you to respond to. . 
I am not "SO" comfortable with her age, she is almost two years older and my friends/family are not comfortable with her status of widow. 
Also my family/friends are not so comfortable with our tribal differences, I'm Igbo while she is from Plateau State. . 
My family are not in support of me marring her. All these are wieghing us down. We have been together for eight months and I am willing to love her kids. 
Mind you we are both University Graduate and working class. . 
Please is it a good idea to marry her. 

Dear, there absolutely nothing wrong with you getting married to a lady who lost her husband in the cold hands of death. 
She is totally single and have the virtues of a good wife which every man desires in his wife. 
If you have found those virtues that you need to prosper in all areas of your life and you are convinced that she is the bride of your heart desire, I do not see the reasons why you should let your friends and family decide on who to marry or what you need from your own wife. 
Their views and opinions is simply their own perception of her personality but you who has been close to her and have seen her heart and the depth of her love should be better informed about who she is and her own weaknesses. 
Are you not comfortable with her age? Will her age really affect her respect and loyalty to you? Do you feel that she will boss you around or is she willing to humble herself and treat you as her own husband and her head? 
Find out from her attitude and disposition, as long as marriage is concerned, man remains the head irrespective of the age of the wife, her financial standing and her personal achievement in life.
If you feel that she cannot respect you as her husband or allow you to be the man in your home, then you may need to reconsider your desire to get married to her because in your home, you must take the responsibility and the authority which God has bestowed to you spiritually, emotionally, and psychologically. 
As for your family not being in support with you, take your time to explain why you cannot get married to their own choice because your marriage is unique and exceptional to you and nobody else. 
Getting married to their own choice is living their own script in your life and you will be anything but happy. 
Instead of getting worried about your parents and your friend's opinions, please get close to God and let him know your thoughts and plans for your marriage.
Allow God to guide your footsteps and help you find the lady who will perfect your imperfections and support you when you need someone who believes in your personality. 
Your happiness is your responsibility, please do not let anyone else distract you from embracing what you truly cherish and have prayed for. 

2 comments:

  1. yes if really u have true love for her.

    ReplyDelete
  2. When you still have a problem with marrying her then so others would do, be convinced that love makes it okay for you both to settle down admist your differences.

    ReplyDelete

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