Monday, November 16, 2015

I Just Want to Leave!

Hello. I just read your wall now. I have a problem. I am married to an abuser. Not physical cos I have learnt to avoid that. But emotionally and financially. He made me stop work in the guise of taking care of the children.
I faced my business squarely. He sneakishly helped me acquire land for my business. Now he has changed all the documents of the land to his name. My business is such that if I move it from his premises, it may scatter. I want to leave him. I want to go with my children and business. But he caged me here. I want to leave. I dont want his money. I just want control of my business and children
Is it wrong to wait till I am set to leave?

I understand that you desire to be free from this man who you have given your heart to love and to cherish. 
I am also aware of your many pains and disappointments this marriage may have bought to you. 
I was meditating on two things particularly and one was, if you were to leave with your children and your business, will you really be happy with yourself? 
And if you let go of all you could gain and strive to make your marriage work, will you not gain more than your business and kids? 
From the tone of your mail, you seem to value your business and children more than your marriage and I may not know at what point you felt that this marriage wasn't worth your sweat. 
He may not have given you access to his money but does he provide the needs of your home? 
I know that he may have provoked you but did you in any way contribute to his attitude towards you lately? 
When last did you forgive your husband and accept him back as your partner? 
When last did you respect him for who he is to you and your family? 
When last did you pray for him and asked for divine intervention in your marriage? 
Ever since he prevented you from working, have you really forgiven him and given your heart to the marriage? 
Even if he changed the names on the documents, does it make him not part of your life and destiny? 
Owning your business and land is it more important than owning Christ in your life and in your marriage? 
Of all that we crave for, only relationship with those we love and those that loves us lives in our heart and soul. 
Look back at where you began from and look ahead to where God is taking you in life. 
Is leaving the best option for your freedom? 
Is freedom really what you need or a happy home? 
Please seek the face of God and meditate on God's word about marriage, take some time if you can to consider the impact of your desire on yourself and your children. 
He may have reacted in the manner he did because you held unto objects more than your marriage. 
Look unto God and see if there are other alternatives than quitting your marriage. 
Divorce is a check up for an irreparable and irreconcilable partners and should be the last option when all other avenues has failed to yield any positive results. 
I know that you are no more happy with your marriage but the joy of your marriage can still be restored if you can seek the face of God and divine intervention in your home. 
Getting married may be romantic but staying in your marriage is a spiritual battle and there is no other way for you to win your home and the heart of your husband if not by praying for him and surrendering him to God's grace and mercy. 
I am hopeful that your marriage will not end up like those you told me about and that at the end of it all, you shall possess your possession and reap your inheritance in your marriage. 

1 comment:

  1. Dear poster..
    From your complaint, it is very difficult to actually deduce what your husband has done wrong up to a point where you want to quit your marriage for no other thing but Business sake..It's unbelievable...
    One could easily get a clue of the type of woman you are by mere reading this post..A family woman who has made her business her main priority..
    Your husband has not stopped you from doing your business..he only changed the name on the property documents to his name and this could be for security reasons...i wonder why this should be a problem..
    I feel your husband has sensed that you are more concerned with your business than the family and he simply wants to make you understand that it all belongs to the family just when you seem to get blown away by your business...He wants to make sure you remain loyal and committed to him and the family...
    Moreover, you are married into that family and you bear the family name...
    Therefore...madam..if at all you have no ulterior motive whatsoever, this should not be a problem..
    You are a married woman and i believe you know the consequences of a divorce..
    I believe this idea must have come from the devil just to make you miserable...Think on this


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