Tuesday, December 1, 2015

He's a Bit Ugly and Small!

Greetings Aunty Amara, I thank God for a woman like you, may God continue to shower you with wisdom. Please ma post this for me and advice me also.
I am 24 years old, just graduated recently and he is 32 years. We became close since June this year though I knew him before then, he declared his intention to marry me but before then I had a friend whom I love but don't really like his village but this my friend now has a good background and he is a born again Christian.
When he first told me he wanted to marry me, I told him to give me sometime to pray to God if it's His will because I don't want to make mistakes in marriage due to the problems I hear most married people have and the rate of divorce.
I prayed and also asked some men of God to pray as well if he was God's will, they said Yes that he loves me and also the family will take me like their own daughter which was one of the things I dreamt of in marriage.
This man is a good man, with a good heart and he has a future, he is not that rich as he doesn't have a car for now but I know with time he will.
The problem I am having now is that I don't like his physique and he has small body,looks a bit ugly to me but my brother has seen him and said that he is okay.
Am trying to love him deeply since he has other qualities I need in man apart from his stature and he stammers a little. Aunty please should I leave him or is it that those things doesn't matter cos that's what my elder sister told me.
Will I develop more love for him in future? Please advice me. Thanks.

If that man was created by God, he is not ugly and no matter how small his body maybe, it doesn't in any manner or form reduce his personality, integrity, passion and purpose in life. 
If you are not comfortable with the way God created him and you are not proud of his personality, please do not force yourself on him but I would rather suggest that you trust God for your own kind of man who is handsome and huge, non stammerer and with the kind of physique that you admire. 
In marriage, the physical attributes of any man contributes very little to what you need to be happy and fulfilled in life. 
That a man has a small personality doesn't make him less in God's sight and it doesn't mean that he will be a poor and irresponsible man in his family. 
If he has a personal relationship with God and has a purpose of which he daily give his heart to and you have prayed concerning his personality and God gave you an answer, why then are you still in doubt about getting married to him and even if you don't like his outlook, why not let him be instead of mocking his personality? 
He's a good man who has a great future though without a car but you are convinced that he will be happy flying around the world with you, so where did this ugly part of him emanate from? 
Sometimes God prepares great treasures in an unattractive containers so that those who can see beyond the physical can receive it and enjoy the faithfulness of God.
Please seek the face of God concerning this and hear from God himself so that you can make a decision on whether to continue with him or to let him be. 


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  2. When one decides to chase shadows and ignore substance, it always ends in regret..There is no shortcut....
    Why then did you approach men of God to seek Gods opinion when your mind was already made up on what to do? You suddenly do not believe the pastors again...Lol
    If you don't like his stature, please leave him for women who will appreciate him the way he is..
    What made you so confident that your own physique is certified ok?
    Don't be compelled to marry a man you're not ok with...It's a pity that you neglected other good qualities and held onto his physique as your main priority...
    Keep looking out for a guy with a wonderful physique...
    I feel you have a whole lot to understand before plunging into marriage..What keeps couples together is beyond physical features oh..It's all about those attractive qualities you can't see...you need to get spiritual and get serious...

  3. What are you really looking for with a man? You said he is a God fearing and so what exactly do you want , a handsome with bad behaviour who beats you any time, I guess you are so young also a dreamer one that is why you said unnecessary thing.

  4. Dear,you want me to tell you the truth? I will,and it is this: You are not yet ready for marriage. Some of your ideas still need to be straightened out. Entering marriage with your current kind of mentality,will cause you unnecessary pain tomorrow.
    P.S. Never marry someone you are not PHYSICALLY & SEXUALLY ATTRACTED TO. They may not be the main things,but they are VITALLY IMPORTANT. I wish you the best.
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