Sunday, January 10, 2016

My Family Makes Mockery of my Size!

Good day AVL, Wishing you and all members of AVL a happy new year may God grant each and every of you all your wishes for this year 2016. I do appreciate your good works and may God continue to bless you richly.
I'm a lady of 32 years of age by 26th February, I have this thought that has been bordering me and I decided to share to hear your advice, I happen to be a size 16 in weight but even at that i'm very flexible, good looking facially, and I believe I would make a good home if I'm married. I do eventually what a slim person can possibly do, I also do a bit of exercise to keep fit but don't really kill my self all because I want to slim down, in fact the only way I feel big is only when I look in the mirror but my problem is my parents and siblings, they always make me feel bad about my nature because they happen to be on the slim side, especially one of my younger sisters she always insult me of my big size whenever we're having misunderstanding telling all sorts of words just because I'm fat, telling me how I will remain single because of my big nature and how Nigerian men don't like fat ladies that they can only date them but will never marry them and this talk makes me feel insecure and unwanted.
Anytime a man approaches me, I always think they just want to have fun with me and then when it's time for them to settle, they go and choose a slim lady to marry, that makes me not to give in my full concentration in guys. I will simply give out my contact and then don't care if he calls or not because I won't even take the guy serious especially when he invites me to his home and my question is am I reacting wrongly or is there anything bad in being a big size because at times I feel very bad when someone tries to remind me that am not on the slim side?
Please I need an advice and will appreciate if I'm not being insulted by fans..Thanks and God bless..

The funny thing is that your sister isn't the special adviser for single men's affairs yet she was speaking as though she knew what men wanted in their wives. 
On the contrary, men love it well packaged and balanced and that's the kind of body God blessed you with. Nothing on the excess but everything is beautiful with your body and I can assure you that many men are praying to have someone like you to marry because I can tell that while men would not want their wives to explode, most of them can do without some pile of flesh here and there. 
Choose today to celebrate your beautiful body and your loving heart and stop living like a slave because of the perception of your sister and parents because everyone is entitled to their own opinions but none can tell the will of God for your life nor can anyone tell God's purpose for your life. 
Please do not react negatively to men and think that they are all out to use and dump you, continue improving yourself spiritually, emotionally and psychologically. Add skills to your knowledge and improve on your ability to appreciate yourself. 
If you do not appreciate yourself, nobody will appreciate you in the manner that you crave for. 
Look good, be beautiful and avoid offering sex as a bait to keep a man. Instead build a healthy friendship with everyone who's interested and allow them to decide on what they want in life. That one man left you doesn't in any mean that all men are out to exploit you and leave you. 
Pray for your relationship and ask God to bless you with the bone of your bone. Do not let the opinions of men, your sisters and parents make you to forget all that God has prepared for you and how much he cherishes you as his precious daughter. 
Let us allow God to answer those who feel that we cannot succeed in our endeavours while we continue to pray and ask for his grace to remain faithful to his words and be closer to him.


  1. Let me diffuse your tension;i vowed to marry a plumpy lady since i was a teenager,the only condition is she must be smart and thst is how God settled me.God never made mistake so don't pitch your tent with inferiority.You are the best.

  2. I was told same thing because I was a size 18/20 when I got married .I was told my younger ones will marry before me because they are prettier . Well who's it that says a thing and it comes to pass when the mouth of the Lord declared it not. I started correcting everyone that I am pretty, indeed I am. I got married before them. I am way bigger than I have been but quite pretty. Despite my size, guys still stop for me. I dress well and wear good makeup. I don't look close to 40 but I am. Indeed being big is no issue. I am flexible and by the time we talk you will know that I am much more than a fat lady. I love me, though I am currently working on losing 15kg. I am doing it for me not anyone. Buy a good girdle and always wear fitted clothes not baggy. If trousers don't flatter your figure, ditch it for dresses though not flared ones. Be confident in yourself. Love will find you.

  3. @kaima, good one and nice contribution, quite encouraging

  4. Tell yourself that your beautiful and surely others will see you as such.


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