Wednesday, February 24, 2016

How Can I Find Love Again?

Good morning Aunty Amara, please I need your help and advice. I was hurt and disappointed by my last girlfriend. It all started when I went for youth service in the year 2014. I decided to visit her in school unannounced but lo and behold I met her with another man. I was deeply hurt and I later realised that they made out so I left the relationship.
I loved her so much and had a well planned future for both of us but I can't live with her because she abused the trust I have for her.
Ever since then I found it difficult to find another. Anyone I see is already hooked up with someone else and I don't want to discourage any girl to leave her present relationship because of me, I consider it bad.
Please dear how can I find love again.


Forgive your ex. Sometimes the pains and the experiences of a failed relationship or abused trust may negatively influence one to be afraid, and discouraged to give one's heart to loving or to another partner.
But for the fact that one relationship didn't work out doesn't mean that the next will be the same or worse. All you need to do is to examine your past relationship, find out what went wrong, where did you miss it and what could you have done better, where there some signs that you ignored and where there some things you could have varied? What values did you ignore or did you build your relationship on? Did you allow God to guide you or you were guiding God in the relationship?
These will help you to re-strategize and encourage your heart to love again.
That a relationship failed doesn't mean that you are a failure, it means that your values and hers may not be the same or that she was not the one that you needed to be with.
Organise yourself and begin by building healthy friendship with those you share the same values and vision in life. Take your time and do not rush the process of getting to know each other.
If possible, keep sex in the shelve so that romance won't be cloud your eyes to the realities of her personality and her weaknesses.
When you are convinced or comfortable with the lady you appreciate, then you may take it to another level by letting her know your intentions.

2 comments:

  1. Ma, please permit me to say this. The idea of unannounced or surprise visit should be ruled off in relationships. Courtesy demands that you inform people before visiting. Bumping into people's houses is not a good sign at all. To me, you unannounced visit brought you an unannounced surprise.
    Kindly pick up your heart, dust it and follow the advice aunty Amara has given you. All the best!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Ma, please permit me to say this. The idea of unannounced or surprise visit should be ruled off in relationships. Courtesy demands that you inform people before visiting. Bumping into people's houses is not a good sign at all. To me, your unannounced visit brought you unannounced surprise. 
    Kindly pick up your heart, dust it and follow the advice aunty Amara has given you. All the best!

    ReplyDelete

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