Wednesday, February 10, 2016

How Can We Date without Sex!

Good morning ma, please l need your good advice on how to handle this relationship......
There is this guy that was disturbing me when l was in 200 level, but he has graduated now then l refused cos l didn't want a school boyfriend but has graduated since 2014 but he was still asking me to accept him into my life. So l decided to give him a try but l told him let's take our time to build the relationship (to know certain things about him and he will know me too) he said no problem he came to school to visit then someone called him but network was disturbing so he said l should send a text for the person after sending the message, l checked his inbox l saw a message a lady sent to him content(Obim, have you eaten etc) Note : he saved the lady's number with my lovely.. When l saw this things l kept quiet, l didn't ask there but after some days he called me l told him that l saw all the text a lady have been sending to you so he thought I was a fool, but he was begging me not to leave him that it was the lady that saved her number with (my lovely) that he love me bla bla... I told him l can't continue anymore so l decided to block him on WhatsApp and Facebook he was calling me but l didn't pick....
After some weeks he continued calling so l picked his call he was begging not to leave him that l should give him a second chance so we decided to renew the relationship, l told him that sex was not allowed cos l made a vow to God to keep myself till am married but am not a virgin he said no problem but he's ex girlfriend told him the same thing but later travelled to Ghana to meet a Facebook friend from there the guy drugged her and raped her, that it was the lady that he intended to marry but l asked him how did he know that the lady slept with someone else and the guy disvirgined her, he said the lady came to his house so he decided to touch and the lady allowed him then he slept with her.
He asked the girl but you said you are a virgin how come that was how the lady narrated the story.... He said hope the same thing won't happen between me and him l told him that am not a virgin but l want to keep myself till am married...
Note have never asked him for anything and will never try that cos am contended with the little l have...... Please ma , how do make this relationship to move smoothly without sex....

It begins by agreeing with him to keep sex out of the relationship and then do everything possible to avoid creating a room for sexual intimacy. It's one thing to say that you don't want to have sex before before getting but another thing to help your partner to stand by you and your decision.
If you always meet in a place where two of you can express yourself in the dark and in the company of nobody else, there's no need to wish that he won't sleep with you.
If you always wear sensual dresses or expose your breast and laps to him and allow him to romance you in a manner that you will forget your surname,it's only but a matter of time for him to lunch into your vagina.
Discuss about the future of your life, your vision, his passion and his plans. There are games, and exciting sports or programmes that will be of greater benefit to you and enhance your relationship.
Remember that keeping yourself for your husband is not to punish your boyfriend but to help him understand that you wish to honour the owner of your body and life and not to venture into sex which may result in pregnancy which you may not be prepared for at the moment.
Discuss extensively with him and agree on whether he's comfortable with your decision to avoid misunderstandings that could may trigger because of sex.



  2. Its not easy,but yiu can!..I passed the same route,an settled now,gloriously married and wedded immediately.

  3. Its not easy,but yiu can!..I passed the same route,an settled now,gloriously married and wedded immediately.


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