Saturday, February 27, 2016

I'm Thinking of Committing Suicide!

Good morning dearest one ,am writing cos am about committing suicide, life is full of misery,I was born into the family of five ,am the second child ,my parents never loved me from birth,due to the circumstances surrounding my birth I was a sick child ,all a sudden after my birth my dad lost his job ,they moved back to the village. 
I was hated from birth,they put my younger ones in school and left me to look after the house , at times I cry, they later put me in government afternoon school, I was affected psychologically, I cried everyday and felt cheated ,but they were not remorseful, rather they called me a worthless child. This made my younger ones to lose respect for me ,at times I fight for my right ,but they will all gather and call me a witch. I became very sickly and I felt rejected, and dejected. My eldest sister was the goddess of our home her word counts ,every word she said stood. My parents can kill for their children's sake except me, my eldest sister once ran away from home, my parents almost died in search of her, but when I tried running away nobody looked for me or cared if I was dead, rather when I came back, my mum asked why I came back that she thought I was dead.
I started planning of leaving that home any how, I got into a relationship that lead to marriage ,I knew my hubby was a cheat ,but then I preferred to be with a cheat than stand a minute in that wicked home ,we managed to do our wedding , and now my hubby cheats on me , am on depression drugs.
I can't go back ,I can't remain in my marriage am having suicidal thoughts.... Have lost my mind ,even till dates they still see me as a black sheep, they don't care about my pains.
I have never known love, am dying, I need help I don't want be on the streets roaming as a mad woman, who can I talk to?

Always remember this, no matter what you are going through in life, committing suicide will never bring the solution to your challenges instead it will take you straight to hell. 
The life that you have is not yours, the earth that you live in is not yours, all that you have today were given to you by God so please trash the thought of committing suicide because it's the weakest thing to do. 
If I understood you well, you got married to a cheat as a result of your parent's attitude towards you and you can no longer cope with the emotional torture and loneliness in your marriage. 
Even if your parents and siblings hate you, you don't need to hate yourself too so please raise some money and rent an apartment so that you can live there and organise yourself. You didn't say if you have children but no matter what the picture may look like, you cannot continue blaming everything around you when you can create the kind of environment you desire. 
Instead of losing your mind, please it's wiser to lose your marriage and everything else that's troubling your heart and regain your sanity. 
You are closer to God than ever imagined, he's yearning to reach out to you to embrace you and strengthen your heart, please do not run far away from him and from his love. You can meet with your local church if you need some assistance in the interim. 
His grace is sufficient for your challenges and his presence will leave you especially now that you need him most. 


  1. My dear dont think towards that, if u do that all ur tormentors and devil will rejoice, you have something great in you thats why devil is doing anything possible to subdue you.pls dont allow him to achieved it.God is about to settle ur problems,and devil doesnt want u to withness it.just put your knees on the ground and cry unto God,he will either give u instant result or peace or hope. Im sure he will do one of this things.trial makes victory sweater.pls dont give up.

  2. Suicide is for the weak and from ur story ur a fighter so y giv up nwn.Do u knw if u commit suicide ur tomentors will say it obvious,she's evil and remb ur condition is not the worst on earth its just dat u chose to be defeat.God kept u alive to prove a lot of people wrong so dnt allow a bad husbnd and family to destroy u coz God is greater.riseup and detach any human agent of pain


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