Monday, July 4, 2016

I Feel Cheap and Hurt Cos I Gave my All.

Good morning ma, your advice to people pushed me to discuss with you. I am 26 years old in a relationship with a guy of 40 years old just for three months. We ended it two weeks today because right from the onset he said he likes me and he wanted us to go into the relationship. I agreed but after then he told me that he likes a woman with a big breast, a woman that is fair, a woman that is tall and has straight legs and I don't have those things he mentioned.
I asked him what he was doing with me since that is what he likes, he told me that God knows the best, he claimed to be born again that he need God's conviction before he will marry me. Though he is not my kind of man in terms of looks but every time and day I spent with him I grow loving him the more, everything a woman does for her husband, I did for him, I treat him like a king he is and he appreciates it.
Two weeks today, I went to spend a night in his place, we got talking and he said he is worried about me that God has not given him conviction about both of us getting married. I asked him if the both of us should split, he said he doesn't know, I now told him let us split because I am not the kind of woman he want.
He concurred immediately, I felt cheap. It hurts me because I gave everything to the relationship and I still love him. Please tell me what to do and that night he told me that his father asked him to look for a lady from his place and marry.

When you are dating a baby boy in an old man's image, this is exactly what you get because he can't tell exactly what he want, and at the same time won't have the courage and the conviction to go for what he feels that he need. 
It's painful that you felt that he was in love with you even when he openly made mockery of your personality and his own maturity as an individual. 
Though 40, such a man is a disaster waiting for any lady who doesn't see beyond his facial outlooks and sweet tongue. 
If he's really a born again Christian as he claimed, he won't touch your breast let alone having sex with you. Instead he will pray, get convictions, then properly get married to you before having sex with you. 
I'm trying to help you understand that what you feel that you cannot do without actually doesn't have the virtues and the attributes of a responsible and focused man. He's a liability that cannot figure out his identity and seems to be confused at the moment.
You don't need to feel cheap or have low self esteem of yourself but learn from this and move on with your life. 
I mean I'm wondering when a man who is still breastfeeding from his parents at 40 will start walking or stand out as an individual. 
Just thank God that it didn't last beyond three months, else it would have been worse than this.
Cheer up, be strong and trust God for your own husband. I feel that you deserve better than him.


  1. Why do you think he is single @ 40 it's because he is immature. Although 40 but he is 15 plz wait for your man and 4get diz baby boy

  2. Why do you think he is single @ 40 it's because he is immature. Although 40 but he is 15 plz wait for your man and 4get diz baby boy

  3. He has already seen someone to marry and has started the process. He told you that just to prepare your mind for his exit. You were just a fling. Wise up and move on.


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