Wednesday, August 3, 2016

He's Dating A Lady in His Compound.

Good evening big Aunty... Please, I need your kind advice on this issue bordering me. Am 31, educated and working.... I have not been able to maintain any good relationship.. So I try to be on my own and focus on my job.. Until I met a guy at a meeting I went to represent my company, the moment I saw him, I liked him and I saw the way he was looking at me all through the meeting, but after the meeting we parted, but his thought keep troubling me, so I made findings about him, and got his number, and called him, and without any delay we became friends...

The problem now is, he said he can't take me to his place now because he has a lady he is dating in his compound. Is over a month now, we talk everyday, I call him at odd hours and he answers me well, but I feel insecure not knowing his place and he comes to mine...
Today I told him that I can't continue and he came to my place and pleaded I give him time to sort things out.... He kept telling me that I will know his place, that if I want he will go show me his compound and hang out with me in his area, but I must give him time...
Well, he keeps telling me he loves me, which I know he does like me very much especially the way him treats me... He is single, 34 and my place is far from his, and he stays with two of his friends in his place and he said that the lady has been nice to him, he just doesn't want to hurt her.... But am confused.... What should I do ma????

No matter what a man says, always pay close attention to his attitude towards you and a closer attention to how he presents you to others.
From all you said, you are the one who is deeply in love with him and you expressed your affection to him, which I am not worried about.
However, when you realised that he was already in a relationship with another lady, the best thing you ought to have done was to severe the relationship and give him some space to sort out himself and do the right thing.
You never did that, and that is why he's gladly combining both of you and giving you reasons why you must give him some time because he doesn't want to 'hurt' her.
Who can tell exactly who he loves more? Who can tell exactly what he want in a lady? He's the only one who knows the answers to these questions and until he does that by his actions, it's in your best interest to separate from him and wait for a man who is emotionally available for a relationship.
If he's still hiding you and trying to look for ways to relate with his nice girl in his compound, then you're a distraction to their relationship and there's every possibility that as he's telling you all these stories, he'll always go back and sleep with her and then come to you and ask for more time.
So I will encourage you to withdraw from the relationship, stop communicating with him or investing your emotions in him, and wait until he has sorted out himself.


  1. Why do women like drama, girl 31 or not, uur own man is in this universe, ask God to send him to U

  2. chinenyenwa OnunkwoAugust 3, 2016 at 3:53 PM

    Will always be proud of u, big sis.the truth is bitter, but must be said.GOD bless u mam.

  3. He is simply not yours,where is trust in this?.

  4. ...And for the fact that u both are now intimate u might find it difficult to let go as Amara as advised. But @ 31 u should be able to love with u brain .but u can continue if u want "just friends with benefit" that to just grease ur body when u feel it .but on this journey u set for urself. It a long tin gurl

  5. He is either married or living with a woman. The neighbour story is fake. You can choose to stay and waste your time sha


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