Monday, August 15, 2016

I Love Him More than I Love my Fiancé.

Hello Mrs Amara.. God bless you and am happy to write to you for the first time. Please ma I need your counsel.. I have a fiancé and our traditional marriage is scheduled for next month but there is a problem. Before he came into my life I had someone I loved and he loved me too but he's not in the same country with me,( me and my fiancé are in the states, he's in Canada) he promised coming to visit me this August but some four months back we started having communication issues..

That was when I started talking to my fiancé and everything moved so fast. We are family friends with both my fiancé's family and his own family too.. My fiancé has been nothing less than a very nice person to me.. He tries to make me happy and shows me love in every way he can.. The other guy told me he would be going to Nigeria in December but never told me why.. He only said he would be seeing my mom..
So when he found out I was getting married, he called me and started expressing everything he planned for us, he had been in tears since then, called everyone we know together to ask if it's true even my mom. How he wanted to propose to me in August during my birthday, how he intended to go with his people to my family in December..
He said he can't believe he lost me in just few months because he was busy with work and school..( I knew he had gone to do a course) I love him more than I love my fiancé but a lot is at stake.. Please ma advice me.. I need to make a decision as soon as possible.. Thanks ma'am



Silence may suggest that something may be wrong with a relationship but it's actually not sufficient to jump into another relationship and accept marriage proposals within the space of four months. This is where you missed it because the very moment you started having communication issues was the best time to call his attention and find out what could be the challenge, and not for you to assume that things are not going well and then get hooked up with another man.
Notwithstanding, when a lot is at stake, I go for what makes me happy, fulfilled, peaceful, loved, and eternally grateful to God. I know that no decision will be palatable to both parties but I can take a decision that even in twenty years time I will look back and still have many reasons to be grateful for the choice I made.
Great your fiancé is a nice man and has great vision for your life, but will getting married to him give you the peace, the love, the fulfilment, and the eternal satisfaction that you desire in your marriage? Will you accept him over everyone else even when things are not working out as you anticipated?
Will getting married to him make you forget about every man in the whole universe and focus on him?
Do you really see your husband in your fiancé?
Just like your mail suggests, your heart belongs to your first partner, traditional wedding and white wedding are ceremonies we do to inform the world of our choice of partner but you are the only one who can tell who your heart yearns to be with for the rest of your life.
If you have prayed, meditated, and examined everything, and you're convinced that getting married to your fiancé won't be in your best interest, kindly return his ring and cancel the traditional wedding.
It will be painful and devastating but at least you will be saving your head and heart from a lifetime of regrets if you go on to marry a man simply because you want to please the society and displease yourself.
But if you are comfortable with your fiancé, kindly bid your first partner goodbye and go ahead with your fiancé.

7 comments:

  1. When a good thing is coming ur way, distractions are bound to come. Focus on ur marriage pls. Go to God in prayers and reject this tempation

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  2. You know what you want for urself
    Write out the qualities you want in a man
    Write out what they both have
    Compare and contrast
    Then pray about both of them
    May God lead u right

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  3. You better marry your fiance. This is the devil trying to put confusion and distraction in your head. This is very common among women. I also experienced it. Please remain focused and marry your fiance. I'm glad he makes you happy. I repeat you do not have to get distracted. That other man will surely disappoint you and you will see. Ask others ladies period

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  4. You better marry your fiance. This is the devil trying to put confusion and distraction in your head. This is very common among women. I also experienced it. Please remain focused and marry your fiance. I'm glad he makes you happy. I repeat you do not have to get distracted. That other man will surely disappoint you and you will see. Ask others ladies period

    ReplyDelete
  5. Listen to Ugochi Orii and myself. Pray and go ahead with your marriage. Do not listen to the voice of the devil speaking through your ex

    ReplyDelete
  6. Listen to Ugochi Orii and myself. Pray and go ahead with your marriage. Do not listen to the voice of the devil speaking through your ex

    ReplyDelete
  7. You better marry your fiance. This is the devil trying to put confusion and distraction in your head. This is very common among women. I also experienced it. Please remain focused and marry your fiance. I'm glad he makes you happy. I repeat you do not have to get distracted. That other man will surely disappoint you and you will see. Ask others ladies period

    ReplyDelete

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