Tuesday, August 16, 2016

What Do I Do to Win His Heart?

Good day ma, my issues and story is quite long but please be patient with me, I will try and make it short but just hope you will get a clearer picture of the whole thing and understand me. I never thought I will in this position I have found myself today.
I married my husband in 2012 December, things have been okay apart from normal marriage issues.
Back to last year March, we needed to travel to Abuja and use the sister's car. We talked over it and till date I don't really know what happened but my husband came home angry and hit me, and asked why I ended the call on him, and ever since then things changed.
Somehow both families got involved and since then we have been together I knew things were not that okay but when I speak to him about it, he will tell me he finds it difficult to come out of his shell when things like this happen, so I told him that I will be waiting for him to come out of shell so we can discuss and iron out things. Then this year May, we had a little disagreement.
To cut the long stories short, after we talked about it, the next day when I came back from work, I discovered that my husband has moved his things out of the house, and sent me a text message. I called him to ask him why he did that, long story made short, he finally came back after three days for us to work things out. At this point his family was involved too, however the sisters were in support of him leaving me cos what I discovered was that he spoke with them what his issues are but never told me anything, his brother was the only one who never supported him.
When he came back, I discovered he got a girlfriend already and they are so much in touch to the extend he told her he was ending the marriage etc, so many things I got all of that from his phone and chat with the girl. I called the girl and told her to let us be cos she is always calling my husband to find out what is happening to both of us and all that which I was not okay with. She even sent me a text to remind me that she knows my husband has moved on with his life, I talked to husband about it and even his brother and called her to stop the calls and the chat.
The issue I have right now is for a while it stop but again they have started another communication again which am not okay with, knowing fully well that we are just trying to pick up and forget the hurts and she is here in the picture again. What do I do now cos I can't take this, am thinking of calling the girl again to tell her to stop calling my husband, and also ask my husband if he is still in touch with her cos he came back home last night after he close from work please advice me.

I read your mail severally so that I can spot what's exactly happening in your marriage but I wasn't sure I was able to spot the challenges in your marriage. 
Well I will suggest that you don't continue talking with his mistress, she's actually not the problem you have in your marriage but your husband. 
It was your husband that made advance to her, it was your husband that initiated the communication between both of them. It was your husband who sought after her company. 
So if you wish to fix this leaking pot of affection and commitment in your marriage, you need to work closely with your husband and explore every means available to you to win your husband back to you. 
He seems as though he has given up on the marriage and is only there to fulfil all righteousness while he dates any lady that he feels like. 
What could have lead him to give up on your marriage? What was it that you did which he couldn't forgive you of? What changed after you contacted his relatives and he hit you? 
There are many questions begging for answers and I believe that you are in the best position to tell what exactly is going on in your marriage. 
It's never too late to invite God in your marriage, while you work towards strengthening the communication and commitment in your marriage, please talk to God in the best way you can and allow him to fight your battles for you. 

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