Monday, September 19, 2016

Abusive Men: Blame Mothers Too

The hand that rocks the cradle rules the world.
Sure you know who rocks the cradle-mothers. Men are not good, they are wife beaters, lazy bones, wayward, bla-bla-bla. Who raised those men? I don't know about you but I see it more as failure on our part as mothers. We are in for the worse if we don't turn and do things right. You are married, you have children, but you can sacrifice your children for career and money. The most important thing in your life is your fame and career and this has made you to sacrifice your children on the altar of money and power.
A girl, fifteen years old, once told me how much she hates her mother who is a top banker. When I tried to change that mindset by making her to see that mummy is working for her comfort, she turned around and said, "I wish I have a mother like you". Then she said, "I don't care about her money, I want her time". Mothers, please take it easy. Often times it appears ours is not just about making money for the comfort of our family, it looks more like competition with the men. This is one spirit that is destroying this generation and destroying homes. Women are in competition with their spouse. You know within that you are not working just because your family has to be okay; you are working in excess because you are in competition with your husband and friends. Work hard, give your best to your career, but never do that at the expense of your home.
Build your career, make your money, be relevant in the society...I do all that. But please, don't do anything in this life at the expense of family. Soon, the bones shall become brittle, the supple skin frail, the bright eyes will go dim, the smooth face shall wrinkle, the job you so worked for will abandon you for a fresher blood, your high flying boyfriend and colleague will abandon you for a younger blood, the only people who will stick with you are your spouse and children. Make them happy now; give them your time now because you will be the one asking for their time soon. My children and my spouse are my greatest assets and I make sure I invest time in raising them because when all is gone, they are the ones that will make me die a happy and fulfilled woman.
Live a balanced life. My prayer has always been
Proverbs 30:7-9
O God, I beg two favors from you;
let me have them before I die.
First, help me never to tell a lie.
Second, give me neither poverty nor riches!
Give me just enough to satisfy my needs.
For if I grow rich, I may deny you and say, “Who is the Lord?”
And if I am too poor, I may steal and thus insult God’s holy name.
Greed has never and will never produce anything good. This whole power tussle with the men is destroying our children. Build your career but build wisely. In the workplace, shout and fight for gender equality (I support that, there must be equality in the market place), be a leader and control things, but please, drop it outside your gate before entering your matrimonial home. When you build just your career, the only thing you can offer your children is money after which they become damaged for life.
Wisdom is the principal thing, in all your getting, get wisdom.

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