Tuesday, October 11, 2016

I Feel Like A Betrayer To My Partner.

Ma good evening ma,  ever since I came in contact with your page, honestly it's been happiness all through, with the advice you give to people of has helped me both in my relationship and the way I relate with male folks... Once again, thank you ma am grateful.... 
My story goes like this
Ma, by the grace of God, I have in a relationship with this guy I am so much in love with, my dream husband, my best friend, a true friend,
he has always been there for me,  both in good and in bad times, a man who believes so much in me and my future. 
Ma, for the past five years we have been together (though he travelled out last two years) and before he travelled, I promised him I was never going to cheat on him till he's back (which I have really tried in keeping my promises)  mana ofu ihe mere yesterday (something happened yesterday) which I have never been myself...  
I feel like am a disappointment and a betrayer, I happen to have sex with this guy that has been showing me so much attention recently and I have never been myself, I can't eat, I can't do anything...  I am someone that likes keeping to my words no matter how difficult it is. 
Please ma help me and advice me, I just feel that I have failed my boyfriend and broken my promise to him... And again I don't know if I should tell or not, or I should just forgive myself and put things the way it was before...  
Am really confused, please tell me words to get me back to my feet..  Am seriously down..


Your mail raised two concerns about your relationship with your partner. One of the concerns which I'm worried about is your communication with your partner and the level of commitment both of you share in your relationship. 
If there was an intimate atmosphere and communication between you and your partner, I don't think that you will feel so much pressure to fall for the man who was showering love and affection to you.
The second concern which is why you feel bad and worried is your faithfulness to the relationship. Truth is that if you are truly faithful to your partner, you won't give room for a temptation like this in the first place. 
You won't accept any gift from a man who you know has an intention to date you. You won't carry your body to his room or perhaps accept him in your room to the point of having sex with him. But all these happened because you permitted it. 
Truth is that long distance relationship comes with so much pressure and tension. If for two years now you have not set your eyes on him, there's every possibility to feel wearied and worried especially if there are some communication lapses in your relationship. 
So the question is, are you sure that your partner is exactly what you need and desire in your marriage? My purpose for asking is that when the pressure is so much, your focus becomes the only inspiration for you to hold unto your conviction. 
If your partner is exactly what you need, then you need to put some disciplinary measures to help you not to give room for infidelity in your relationship, and possibly plan towards meeting with your partner as soon as possible. 
Then you need to forgive yourself and take the responsibility for what happened. You need to terminate the relationship with the second partner and let him know that you are emotionally not available for the kind of relationship that he desires from you. 
Then ask God to forgive you and give you the grace to wait for your partner. I will suggest that you don't inform him of this because not everyone has the emotional capacity to manage this kind of information without terminating the relationship.
I hope and pray that God will perfect all that concerns you and your partner so that both of you can reunite in no distant future.

1 comment:

  1. The funny truth is that,ur guy will feel sometin is wrong somewhere and will ask you what up.
    The second is that this new patner will want more and will do everythin possible to get down to you,now depend if he has marriage intension or chop n clean mouth intension, the guy will be smiling one kin misheif smile now inside while u feel bad,but bet it no be small job to be faithful to a distant partner.
    Just end contact with this new one, cuz he just start,body no be firewood

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