Love: What Really Do You Mean?

Many have lost their God-given chance because of this word, love. Many have missed angels sent into their lives just because they allowed themselves to be carried away by the endless profession of this word, love. I have seen men lose wonderful women because to them, they are not all over them, kissing and cuddling along the road. So many women have lost very homely and good men because they didn't look like what they read in romance books. Women especially, get lured into believing that those fantasies they read about in fairy tale books and see in movies are real.


 Nobody cares to ask and think about the future; nobody cares to know what that person would be as a spouse and parent. Things have really gone haywire in this generation and that is why you find some preachers even use the word, "for better for better, in health and prosperity..."; they do this making their blind followers to believe that it's faith. Hear this Mr/Ms. Preacher; making a profession of faith is different from taking a vow and that is called "exchange of marital vows'.


It's unfortunate that women have lost their place in humanity; it's sad to see how far we've gone to trample on the pride of womanhood. But one thing is clear; real women still exist and they are holding on, firmly, to the ancient landmarks. Now, women are even encouraged to go out there, find, and propose to a man; what a shame. And some stupidly believe its civilization. When a man is ready to find, he goes all out for it.


Once a man sees you and likes what he sees, he begins to think of two things-take her home to mama or sleep with her and move on. And I keep telling women, no matter how much you think you love his six-packs and pocket; no matter your level of desperation for marriage, you are safer when a man loves you more than you do because your love as a woman grows more in marriage while his either remains stagnant or diminishes.


My dear brothers, for a woman, it's GiGo. She wants to see the love you profess put to practice in marriage. She wants to be assured that truly, she's one with you. She wants to know that it is 'our home' and not 'his home' where she's locked out over every misunderstanding. She wants to know that you would defend her even when your family finds it strange. She wants to see a man who would pamper as she cooks his favourite meal instead of shouting at her for food and sex. Did I say shout at her for sex? Yes, some men do that. Her entire being will naturally yield to you when you love her the right way.


You may think you are loving her; are you loving her the way she wants to be loved? Some male clients tell me how much they've done for the wife and how she doesn't appreciate it. Even along the road, we hear men talk about women being ungrateful, leaving them after they trained her in school and setting up a good business for her.


Now my question: Did you assist her in school just because you want to marry her? Then you never loved her. You got her admission and insisted on her studying a course of your choice, not what she likes; don't you think you are selfish? And what makes you think she wouldn't have gone to school if you hadn't married her? She probably would have a PhD. Talk about business; what if she wanted a white collar job in her field of study? The business you opened for her, is that what she wants? Are you sure she's not doing it just to please you? Friendship is important here.


Don't try to love her the way your ex girlfriend liked to be loved. Study her person and discover what does it for her. Don't just take her out, ask her where she wants to go. Don't just make plans for the two of you without putting her into consideration and seeking her opinion.


Study and understand your woman. We are not difficult; we are not that complex, but only a few men understand us; only a few men have the right key to our head and heart, to these men, women are very easy to handle. Every woman has some level of insanity, it only takes a man with the right key to keep her under control without bruising her.

May you find the grace to be this man.