Monday, May 1, 2017

I Love Him so Much but Should I Ignore This?

Good day ma, I am 27 years old. I  am dating a man for four years now. He just finished serving. He is kind, caring, and can do anything for me to make me happy.
But recently I found out he likes hitting me and beating for no justiable reason. He always told me whenever he has the money, he will pay my bride price but ma each time I remember how he use to shout at me and how he use to threaten to beat me but will stop and say that it is because he has not married me.
And I don't feel getting married to him because of that. Ma I love him and I know he love me ma what can I do. Please your advice is needed.

If it happened once, we may blame the devil, if it happened two times, we may call it a mistake, but when it happens severally with obvious signs, it is his habit and he needs to work on himself to unlearn his weaknesses before he can cope with another person. 
In relationships and marriages, someone must be offended, hurt, annoyed, or even pushed to the wall, but the way the partners manage their emotions and differences is what shows their mental and emotional maturity, not the things they say when they are in a happy mood. 
Since he exhibits traits of physical and emotional abuse, it will only be wise to put your marriage plans on hold and focus on helping him get help for his outburst. 
Again, it is a time for you to evaluate critically your needs and expectations from the relationship. It's time for you to ask yourself some honest questions about his personality and your emotional, mental and psychological ability to manage his shortcomings and weaknesses as an individual. 
If after an honest evaluation, you are sure that you cannot cope with his personality, please be kind enough to take a walk and wait for a man you are comfortable with.
There are some things that your feelings for him won't be sufficient enough to help you overcome, emotional and mental instability is one of those things.
Take your time, and go for what you are convinced that you can accommodate or tolerate for the rest of your life. 

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