What is the Ideal Financial Management Option for Couples?

Good day sis Amara. God bless you immensely for allowing God use you to be a blessing to many in diverse ways.

I am married for eight years now, though not rosy at all. I want to know the ideal way finances ought to be managed in the family.

My husband doesn't want me to know anything about his income, but he has access to my account. He warned me not to give anyone including my parents money without telling him, but he gives anyone he likes money without my knowledge.

He wants me to submit all my income to him, so he does all the financial management from there.

Please, I want to know the ideal way finances should appropriated in a family. God bless

There are different financial models couples may adopt in their home to ensure accountability, transparency, and commitment to their marriage. 

1. Joint Account. 

This is where couples jointly open an account where they deposit certain percentage of their personal income for family expenses. This doesn't stop them from having individual accounts and being accountable to each other. 

2. Contributory System. 

In this case, couples agree to contribute certain percent of their personal income for the running of the family, and perhaps any expenses that the couple feel is important for them. They don't need any bank account to have a contributory system.

3. Distributory System. 

In this system, couple shares duties/responsibilities to each other, and they focus specifically on what they are assigned to do. This also gives individuals autonomy to their finances, and gives room for couple to plan their expenses. 

Now, there is nothing like an ideal financial management system that couples can adopt, but one thing that is very very important in any system that couples deem fit is accountability, sincerity, and commitment to their financial responsibilities and duties in their home. 

What works for one couple may not work for another, so what is important is adopting the system that you and your spouse feel comfortable with, without any form of selfish interest or manipulation. 

If you have a manipulative, selfish, and irresponsible individual as your spouse, then you may need to apply some wisdom and maturity to how you manage your finances. 

You cannot surrender all your money to your husband to spend while he doesn't give you accountability for his own finances. 

You shouldn't give all your financial access to your husband, when both of you doesn't have laid down financial plan for your marriage. 

And you shouldn't give any individual the room to stifle your financial obligations to your parents, or perhaps manipulate you to become a slave to him. 

Just so you know, anybody who can control your finances can control so much about your personal life, and you should always have some money you keep to yourself should there be some eventualities of life which is beyond your control. 

So now is the best time to get things right in your marriage, to avoid being a slave to your husband.