Sunday, May 24, 2015

For men alone

Dear Husband,
I know you love your wife and want her to be happy (even when she gets the opposite from your actions). I know it's been tough trying to figure out what really she wants. You just can't understand why she gets withdrawn the very moment you want some intimacy with her. You don't know why she comes up with all that 'I have a headache ' once it's close to bedtime. To her, it's just another house chore. 
Let me help you with some possible reasons
1. You are not patient with her in bed. All you
care about is you, nothing more, nothing less. When this happens, she begins to see herself as nothing but your object of pleasure and this is where resentment sets in. You don't make love to her.
2. The only time she feels like she has a man in her life is when your tank is full. You don't cuddle her; you don't even touch her; you don't know when she wears a new hairstyle;  you don't know her bra size; you don't know what style of dress she likes; you don't pay compliments. You know what's in it for you; what's the attraction for her? 
3. You shout at her from morning till night; you even call her 'ewu' (goat); you care less if her waist is in pain because of house chores; she goes to work and still rushes home because she has to serve you dinner immediately you walk into the door. After dinner, you cross your legs in front of CNN or Super Sports while she cleans up. Sir, you didn't marry a donkey; she's not your slave, she is your wife. Even if you don't think you should help out, show some love. Call her some beautiful names and let her know she's the best. 
4. Words mean a lot to women. You may not give her too much money, but you can keep her forever with those sweet words. This is why you see wives of very rich men sleeping with their steward who notices her new hairstyle and makes positive remarks. You throw money at her and that's it. Sir, she needs love. Money is good, but money without love translates to pain. 
5. If your wife has the problem of frigidity, she won't enjoy it. Frigidity could be as a result of rape, abuse, some old-wives-tale, domestic violence, religion. If you feel your wife is frigid, talk it over with her. But for you to get a woman to that point where she pours her heart out, you must, first, make yourself her best friend. So many husbands are total stranger to their wives. The woman is carrying a heavy burden in her heart, no where to drop it. Get her to open up to you and seek solution from a counselor and therapist. 
6. If you can, make it a point of duty to hang out with her at least once a week. If you can afford it, once in a while, take her to a serene place, away from the home environment. This helps to develop the bond in your marriage. 
7. Learn to talk WITH her and not TO her
8. Always remember this: Men and women are wired differently. You want it because you want to relax; she wants it only when she is relaxed. 


  1. Nice write up and another vital point is if she is not into him ie if she is not total in love wit him. She mit be married to him while her heart longs for another.

  2. There is always room to learn, ,not minding d age,we both men b women should b eager to learn,,listrn attentively to each other,,nobody knws it all, nobody is perfect, ,b patient wit ur spouse,love n respect each other,,communicate wit one another,,communication matters a lot in any relationship,,be ur partners best friend

  3. Good one. OK to put to practise and see how things work out.

  4. Good one. OK to put to practise and see how things work out.


Designed by Tunde Sanusi (Tuham)