Monday, January 4, 2016

Should I Help Him Stand?

Compliments of the season ma.... I bless God for your life and the wisdom he gave you. I need you to post this for me as it means a lot to me most especially now the year is just beginning.
Am the first daughter of my family and I'll be 28 by April.. Am a graduate and I bless God that I have never been idle all my life. I have always believed in hardwork and getting my own and God has been faithful to me.
The issue right now ma is this, I have been in a relationship for seven years now... Right from our university days,he was in 300L while I was in 100L but due to school issues which has to do with carryover,I graduated same time with him.
We went for NYSC same year and finished in 2014. We've had our ups and downs, fights, quarrels and we came out stronger. I got a job immediately after service and he is yet to get something doing. My job is a huge blessing to me because I can make twice or more than what some managers take home as salaries.. I feel for my fiance because it's not easy staying back at home after school doing nothing....
Ma , even with his current situation,he still came to see my parents last year November to make his intentions known without having a job and dad felt so bad that after all the training he gave me I want to end up with someone who has nothing yet.... It's my choice ma because he has never given up on me even when he complained of my attitude sometimes,he won't let me go and he is so humble. And I believe things would change for the better someday cause no one can predict life . Someone here may think it's because he has no job yet that's why he wont let go but my fiance has no idea how much I make, and remember he has been with me when I had nothing at all, even up till date he has never asked me for money.
Mummy am thinking of helping him stand and I don't know how to go about it... I have been looking for a job for him too....I have never been desperate about settling down but I want to take the bold step this year because I have always been afraid of settling down. Mummy ,I want you and the house to advice me on how to help my fiancee.... It's him I want to settle down with... I was thinking of starting up a business no matter how little it is for him and from there we can raise up money to complete the plans we have already started...
Waiting for God to bless him with a nice job.... Will it be wise for me to rent a place for him to stay because he still stays with his family and it breaks him because his father talks to him anyhow and treats him like he's not his biological son. Advice me mummy, I don't want to make a mistake.

I have no idea what that guy was thinking when he went to declare his intentions even when he was doing nothing but that's both courageous and I respect him for that.
He stood by you when everything was not there,managed with you, supported you and today we can say that we have a lady who is favoured of God and is in a position to help another.
Looking unto God who have blessed you beyond measures, don't you think that God would want you to support him and he encourage him even if it be for the fact that God has brought him to your life?
And if you share the same vision and purpose with him, don't you think that encouraging him to stand would be a great benefit for you and your relationship?
I understand your fears but always have this in mind that for every good thing we do for another, there is always a reward from God and it doesn't necessarily matter if the said person appreciates it or not.
Many women have actually been in your shoes and they humbly assisted their partners and made them who they are today while there were some who didn't appreciate what their wives did for them, many others doesn't joke with their wives because they can relate with the way they began.
Please if you are convinced to help your partner, let no third party know about this, not even your parents or friends and please do not boast about this.
Remember that you are doing this first unto God and next to encourage him to stand out and be able to provide the needs of your family and to also strengthen him financially for your marriage.
How you wish to help him is solely at your own discretion but let your purpose and motivation be to help this man as you would help your brother if he was in dire need of help.
Will God reward you for such a selfless sacrifices, that I can guarantee but whether your partner will remain humble and grateful as he is now, I can only hope and pray that God reveal himself to him and give him the grace not to abuse what God has blessed him with.


  1. This lady has a lovely heart, i shredded tests reading this, carry on your good work with Him. God would suprise you

  2. Dear Poster, I do hope you read this message i am about to write. I do not have an issue with you helping him, my dear it is quite commendable. But before you go ahead and help have this in mind you are helping but a friend who may appreciate you in the future by making you his wife or not. Having that in mind, i would like you to know that your job may not last forever things happen. So i would love you to also plan for your own future in line with helping your boyfriend which would still be beneficial to both of you if you get married and also to you if you don't so you won't cry that you spent all your money on him and lost focus on your plans. My dear there are many ways to do that without him even knowing. You are young and i believe don't have so much responsibilities, you can invest in real estates they always appreciate and they are a good inheritance for your unborn children. In summary while helping him out, invest in your own future too.


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