Friday, September 25, 2015

He's Very Stingy!

Aunty Amara, I have dated a certain guy for four good years, I know he loves me and I do too. 
But the issue is that he has never spent his money on me not even ordinary recharge card and I know that money is not his problem. 
He doesn't pet me the way I want it but am very sure that he's faithful. 
So few months back, he sent me gifts through the mum but before then we both agreed on what I needed but to my surprise he got something less than what we discussed. 
I was really angry because that was the first time he was spending on me. 
We started having issue about the gift and I told him that I needed exactly what we discussed. He said I should substitute with the one he got but I refused because I knew that he can afford it a hundred times. He got angry and said I should forget about the gift. 
Later on, he said I should come for the gift but this time around, I refused. He told his mother about this and his mother was mad at me saying that who am I to tell her son what to buy for me? Saying that am not worthy to be her daughter in-law. 
Despite the fact that I have apologized to her and her son apologized on my behalf too but I want to know if I was wrong or not and what measures will I take?
If what someone offered to you be tagged a gift, sweetheart courtesy demands that you first accept the gift and secondly appreciate the giver. 
What you know about him or think he's capable of doing doesn't make any sense here. 
If it was your right, then you can demand for it or press to get but if it be a gift, dear never you fight against the giver. 
It's a sign of ingratitude, greed and selfish intent and nobody will take you serious for such an attitude that you displayed. 
It's both insensitive and sincerely not the best way to have approached him and his mum. 
But I have a serious reservation for your partner of four good years who you claim loves you to bits. 
He's a mummy's puppet and I don't think that he's ripe to be in a relationship yet. 
And for him to have consulted his mother before buying you the gift sends a negative vibe to what you meant by his loving you. 
Secondly a partner who finds it pretty hard to give you something isn't one that you should take serious at all because in his evaluation of assets, he places value for self and money much more than you or your emotions. 
So maybe this should wake up your conscience to the reality of his personality to avoid regrets much later in life. 
Like I said, please learn to be grateful for every gift irrespective of how good or otherwise it maybe. 
What you do with such gift is entirely your decision but be grateful always for every gift and do not settle for a stingy or partner or a Selfish one or a mummy's pet for your own good anyways. 

1 comment:

  1. Nice advice from Aunty Amara...
    To add a little...i think it's also necessary you don't assume he knows he should buy things you need...
    People differ and probably he might not be the type that remembers these things so help him by politely asking for the things you need....i don't mean you should turn him to a gift and money factory..
    Be considerate when you demand..
    Also...cultivate the habit of buying gifts for him should be reciprocal and that could also serve as a good reminder to him that he should do the same to you..


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