Hello Aunty Amara. I've seen the way you advice other people and am glad to be a member of this page.
I'm having a problem with my sex life and it's affecting my tender marriage.
I don't get wet during sex no matter the amount of foreplay my hubby puts in., even when I get wet, I dry shortly like a desert that experienced a little shower.
My hubby has refused for us to use a lubricant and says he wants a permanent solution to it.
This makes us have misunderstandings more often than not cos he sometimes sound like he is blaming me for his unexciting sex life.
I don't know what to do.,he's loving but I'm afraid this might push him into the arms of another woman. I'm scared of losing my home......
N.B I've never had a child before.
Sweetheart, not all women produces enough lubricant that will last for the duration of love making.
It doesn't necessarily mean that you are not healthy nor does it mean that you cannot enjoy sex with your husband.
It may be that during foreplay, you are so anxious and tensed that your body doesn't respond favourably to foreplay.
It may also be that the estrogen level of your body is not as much as you need to produce enough fluid that will make love making as smooth and pain free as possible.
It may also reduce if you are on hormonal supplement.
You need to let your husband understand that not all ladies can produce as much fluid as he desires for a frictionless sexual fulfilment.
Using a lubricant doesn't make sex less beautiful and fulfilling but it enhances penetration and stimulation of the inner vaginal walls and also minimise pains during intercourse.
He needs to know that you need a water based lubricant to minimise the tension and anxiety of having a painful sex with him.
Please encourage him to read this so that he doesn't keep frustrating you in the name of looking for natural wetness.
He may also use his own saliva if he feels that a lubricant isn't good enough for him.
You may also decide to visit an urologist for vaginal examination and hormonal profile testing to ascertain if there is any medical check up that you need or any other drugs that may enhance the production of estrogen for more wetness.
However medical intervention may have its own side effects which is why I may not recommend that for you but if your husband seems impossible to understand the mechanism of your body, then you may consider his concerns and try medical intervention.
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