Tuesday, August 23, 2016

Am Afraid of His Insecurity.

Good evening Ma. Please I need your advice on this issue bordering me now. My guy wants me to take-in for him before coming to pay my dowry and we've dated for two years. I feel his problem towards me is insecurity, and he listens to his friends so much.
Right now, he hasn't been picking my calls for days now and has
not been calling, yet he saw my pictures that I uploaded on Facebook and sent me a message 'that it's because of my so many toasters on Facebook, that's why am not concentrating to settling with him.
He keeps on accusing me wrongly all the time. Am tired of the way the relationship is going for some time now. I need your advice.
But the truth is that am seeing him as someone who does not stand on his words. He has said it several times and yet no attempt till date. We have dated for complete two years now and since I met him, I will say, he is too domineering. He never want to see me talk to any man nor even answer any call from men outside him.
Even though he is caring and loving to be with, he is so tempered especially when it has to do with a man. Even on social media *Facebook * he would always want to know everything about whomsoever that commented on my pictures.
Yet he claims he loves me so much and wants to spend his life time with me. Am afraid of all these his attitude

Men who are battling with insecurities and low self esteem have a higher tendency to be abusive and violent in marriage. 
If you have seen all these flaws and limitations and you're still hanging around him, well I don't know how best to help you understand what you are experiencing in your relationship. 
To start with, any man who insists on pregnancy before marriage is a fraud and shouldn't be taken seriously. The reasons and opinions may look pleasing to the ears but the challenge of such condition is that the marriage is established on a wrong foundation. 
The right foundation for marriage is for companionship not for children. What this means is that marriage is first a journey between a man and a woman who have agreed to work together and achieve their vision in life. 
If a man puts pregnancy before marriage, he's making children the foundation for the marriage. In a scenario where you were able to conceive and impress him, and perhaps had a challenge during pregnancy, what that means is that he will leave you and go for another lady who will give him children. 
Secondly, when a man doesn't give you a breathing space in relationship, he will definitely suppress you in marriage. There is a need for him to work on his weaknesses and learn how to trust you before you can think or talk of getting married to him. Where that is difficult, it will be in your best interest to bid him goodbye because there is no companionship without trust.
Finally I wish to remind you that marriage doesn't change anyone, rather it brings out the real character of your partner. If you are convinced that you cannot cope with his personality, please do not postpone your dooms day by getting married to him, but end the relationship and move on with your life.

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