Aunty I have written to you before but now am losing it. I am the H.I.V positive girl that wrote to you last time.
After reading your advice and that of your fans, I decided to get married to the guy that was positive and I like his personality. I did my traditional marriage and white wedding in May and September respectively.
Am pregnant now but my problem is that he is gay. I have talked to him to stop at least for the sake of our status and my condition it fell on deaf ears.
He is the only son in his family and everybody in his family thinks getting married will change him but NO it didn't.
The calls and chats he has been receiving these days is getting me scared always booking for sex .
I am not perfect as a wife but I try my best to please him, he is the type that likes sex and I don't restrict him from touching me even when he goes out to meet his guy friends,but since Sunday he doesn't even care if I exist in the house again.
I don't know what to do, am in my third trimester and have not bought even an item for the baby,he spends on his boyfriends,to the extent one of them sent me message telling me to warn my husband.
He is one of your fan. Please advice me on what to do.
Nobody changes in marriage instead they reveal their real nature and attitude to others and personality in life.
You will agree with me that nobody made the decision to marry your husband but you were thrilled by his personality much mmore than the other man which made you get married to him.
One of the essential tools to influence your partner is communication. No matter how horrible and displeasing his attitude may be, with the right attitude and communication skills, you have all it takes to help him overcome his weaknesses.
Painfully he is bisexual and from the tone of your mail, you knew but got married to him hoping for a change in his sexual orientation.
While that is possible, it takes some personal sacrifice and perseverance to help him overcome this and be faithful to you.
For now, I feel that you need to focus more on your pregnancy and prepare for the arrival of your baby it will cost you more to raise your child without breast milk.
Gather all the money that you can and go for shopping for your baby's clothing, visit your gynecologist to examine your body and advise you on what's best for you and your baby.
If there's anyone who knows you and your husband and understands what you are experiencing in your marriage, then talk to him or her and seek for ways to encourage your husband to be focused on his family and save his own children and wife from horrible experience.
Let him understand that at this point in his life and marriage, he ought to help his own life and health by quitting gay sex due to the health hazards and infections it poses to the body and by extension to you his wife.
Pray for him and pray with him also knowing that your strength and efforts cannot yield any fruit without God who knows his weaknesses and knows how best to help him and make him whole.
Be encouraged by God's word and do not relent in appreciating him and communicating with him.
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