Wednesday, October 5, 2016

My Husband Insists That I Must Go Home.

Please ma, I need your help and advice. This is not my first time of writing to you, and I have been practicing the advice you gave me, not perfect anyways. The issue now is my husband travelled to Cotonou for business for two weeks. During this period I will close work and go to his shop with my sister-in-law living with us
who also works for my husband. The little money we made was N47,000 and I did some expenses, both paying bills and etc.
Now my hubby is back, he asked me of money, I told him that there is no money on me as I have used them in paying some bills, even the Akawo(mutual funds) he made me to borrow. My husband started calling me names, and saying that I will die premature death, and that God will judge me (money squanderer), he couldn't allow me go to work this morning(Teaching work), he locked me up.
Now he said I should pack my things that am going, and I will not go with the kids.
Note: I left my previous work(Civil Service) just for him to be happy yet every little thing in the house he will start saying I should pack my things and he will start accusing me of evil things.
Right now am regretting my life, the good lasting job that I left, me and the kids are hungry now, he didn't keep money for meal. Am just down ma, please help ooo. Thanks.

I am so sorry for what you are experiencing in your marriage, I believe that God will give you the grace to manage this unpalatable circumstances.
I will suggest that you apologise to your husband for your action and plead that he at least give you money to get something for your children.
When it comes to financial management in marriage, there's every need for couples to be accountable, transparent, honest and sincere with every money they receive irrespective of how little or how much it is.
If you made N47,000 from your husband's business, the first thing you ought to do is inform him of the income generated. Then you will table the list of the bills that must be paid and the cost of each bill. You will write those bills down, keep the receipt of every transaction made and account for how the money was spent.
It is entirely wrong for you to tell your husband that you have used all the money to pay bills without letting him know what exactly you paid for in a written document, at least anyone who reads the list will definitely not blame you for how the money was spent.
Now that you have made the mistake, apologise and then plead that he reconsider his decision to send you back home, where he insists that you must go home, please take your children to your family and let your boss in school know that you won't be available for some time.
Pray for your husband and learn how best to manage his personality to minimise his outbursts.

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