Tuesday, January 16, 2018

Should I Consider Separating From Hubby?

Good evening ma, please help me, I need advice. First of all, thank you so much for the good work you're doing, more grace to you.
I have a problem with my husband. My husband is very stubborn, he never listens to me regarding anything,
it's either his way or the high way.
I've done all sorts of tricks I was told to do, I've submitted myself fully to him as adviced by my spiritual mother, but it doesn't seem to work instead he sees me as a fool.

To go home and see my parents with our children is a problem, I can't spend three hours away from him. We run a family business together, so we are always together. To go out for lunch with women only,  it's another story. I'm suffocated, if I reach out to him and tell him how I feel, he will say I'm complaining and I'm stubborn.
Please help, he's pushing me too much, I was even thinking of separating from him for a while.

If you choose to bury yourself in the sand, people will definitely trample on you like they do to sand. 
The implication of allowing him to manipulate you to his own taste is that you will get suffocated, and that will push you to resent him, then get depressed, frustrated, and irritated by everything he does. 
Because he doesn't give you room to be yourself, you will constantly feel inferior before him and feel used instead of being loved. 
This is totally against the principle of submission that you wish to practice. And it will only destroy your esteem and self confidence. 
To help yourself, there is a need for you to sit your husband down and pour your heart to him. Marriage is not meant to inhibit your personality, instead it's meant to enhance your personality/individuality, and then enable you to synergise with your husband to achieve your desired goals. 
Let him know exactly how you feel, what you can tolerate, and what you cannot manage anymore. Your getting married to him is never a license to be subdued, and your humility is never a reason to be controlled. 
Let him know that you feel choked, and that you can no longer function in that manner. 
You need some breathing space to enable you function in a healthy way in your marriage, and he needs to understand that you are a human being and not a robot. 
Should he not get the message, and you still feel depressed and caged, please take some break and refresh yourself. Because in the end, when you are losing your mind, you are losing everything you thought you were saving. 
And the worst thing that can happen to any married individual is to be with a spouse who controls/manipulates him/her to his/her advantage. 
The moment he sees how serious you are, he will definitely learn to give you some breathing space. But should you continue in this manner, hmmm, you may end up losing your mind all because you want to be a virtuous wife to him.

1 comment:

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