Thursday, March 31, 2016

My Husband Snubbed Me!

Compliments of the season aunty Amy, more grease to your elbow. I have an issue to share with you.
My husband insulted me in the presence of his boys serving us and out of annoyance I sadly talked back at him. He started keeping malice with me, for three weeks now, he avoids my food, no communication, etc.
My kids noticed what was happening, the elder one in SS3 who was about going back to school cried because she wouldn't want my husband taking her back to school, reason was that my initial plan was to take her back to school, after we visit my parent in the same town she is schooling.
Because of that, he seized my car key which he normally do anytime we have issues. I have always been the one to apologise, even if he is at fault. But this time I decided to let him be, but I don't know if I am taking the right step.
Please advice me?

Nobody will congratulate your husband for what he did, but retaliating almost immediately wasn't the best approach. You could have sulked the pains and express yourself in the room where only you and your husband can discuss, shout and listen to each other. When you retaliated, you tampered with the third man in the marriage, the "ego" and that's why you have been relating with the ego where the man is deeply hurting.
Why is he hurting, you may ask, it's because men don't feel comfortable being corrected or exposed by women in the public.. Lol, but painfully they do the same to ladies because they feel that she can take it without complaints.
Since you're fast losing the battle, kindly apologise not because you don't feel pains but because you are stronger emotionally than he is. I hope that you can make out time when he's willing to listen to you, to discuss this with him and plead with him not to broadcast your flaws or insult your personality or attack you in the public sector even if it be in the presence of your children, let alone his stewards.
Please push this further, three weeks of silence is disastrous for your marriage and for your children to become part of this shows that both of you have thrown caution to the wind. Let go of your pains and apologise to him, it's not a matter of how many times you apologised but the fact that you are the spiritual powerhouse of your home and an ambassador of peace in your marriage irrespective of his errors and challenges.
After apologising to him, massage his ego and let him know why you reacted in the manner that you did, and plead that he helps you to become a happy wife to him and a great mother to all. He cannot continue pushing you to the wall and expect you not to react in a defensive and offensive manner.
You also need to engage in praying for your marriage and your husband and ask God for grace and wisdom to manage his flaws and weaknesses in such a manner that will draw him closer to you and give you a greater influence in your marriage.

No comments:

Post a Comment

Designed by Tunde Sanusi (Tuham)