Saturday, April 9, 2016

Should I Move on or be Hopeful with Him?

Good day ma, I appreciate your love and help on the issues of marriages and relationships, God bless you real good. Ma, I have been in a relationship with this guy for some years now.. He loves me, cares for me, he's always there for me, he thinks about me first even before himself, but the problem now is that he does not listen to me at all. He does not have certificate, no handwork, no business.
Presently he's homeless, he does not have a place to rest his head after running around during the day because he could not afford to pay his rent. Anytime I talk to him about setting up a business to earn a living, it becomes an issue between us. He just wants to make life without starting from somewhere, he has this pride that he wants to be noticed and respected anywhere he goes.
Now I can't even talk to him about being self employed or acquiring any skill because he will always feel that am looking down on him and thinking he's a failure. Just yesterday he called me and said that he's planning on how to go and see my parents immediately I return from my NYSC, and when I asked him if he has gotten any accommodation yet, he started comparing himself to some of his friends that got married without any job and some that don't have where to stay after their marriage. He will always say that he will make it in life, but I don't know how.
We have been together for so long that I was hoping that one day he will realize and start up something, but from the look of things, he's not ready to do anything except running around town all day. Am so fed up and confused, really don't know if I should move on or stay and still be hoping. Please ma, help me with your candid advice please, I don't want to make any mistake that I will regret. Hope to read from you soon, thank you and God bless you real good.

I love his faith and convictions but marriage is not a joke for anyone who loves gambling. It's a responsibility for two responsible adults who understands that life is not a fairy tale for the kids.
To get married requires that partners have a stable means of income no matter how little. It requires an accommodation so that both of you can have sex and not be worried about your neighbours. With sex comes pregnancy and there is no charitable organisation that will cater for your needs and the needs of your children except you and your husband.
So if he's really serious and real about getting married to you, then he should organise his life and help you understand his plans and vision for his life and future. If he doesn't have anything to do with his life, I will suggest that you advice yourself to avoid beginning a family that you cannot sustain or provide the needs of your children.
Romance and reality is different so please encourage him to stop watching movies and go out there and write the history of his journey by investing his energy and passion in something that will be of help to himself and the society.

1 comment:

  1. Biko How is this guy planning to make it in life?
    By marrying and using you for rituals?
    Nna mehn, I don't understand this guy and his babe o o .
    If he does not plan now, walk away o o . He already wants to be like some 'friend's who married without a roof over their head and a job???
    In what leagal way did they later make it?
    A word is enough for the wise.


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