Saturday, May 14, 2016

I'm Tired of the Relationship!

Hi Aunt Amara, I really need your help.
I have been dating for one year and four months but I am tired of the relationship. This is because the guy that I have been dating started behaving funny after the seventh month of the relationship. He has a baby mama but before I started dating him, I told him that he should be sure of what he wants and I wasn't ready for drama.
So there was a time he lied to me that he was on a three days seminar only to find him in his house with the woman, I was so shocked that I left without saying a word. He tried to reach me but I warned him no to. Later that evening he came to my house and tried to explain about the situation(that the woman came to reconcile with him but he never gave in) but I didn't believe him. He begged for forgiveness and promised to never lie again so I forgave him.
Some other time he lied again that he had gone to visit his parents only to find out that he had gone to baby mama's place and even spent a night there. When I asked him he said that he had gone to see his son and nothing else and was afraid to tell me because he feared that I could have reacted, he asked for forgiveness and I did so but warned him that it was the last time to forgive him.
Time went on well but at some point he started his fishy behaviour again. He started going to see the baby mama and the kid secretly yet I had no problem with him telling me that he had gone to see his kid or taking care of him. I told him that I am fed up of his behavior and I want to end the relationship but he keeps on begging me not to break up with him cos he loves me. I can't take this anymore and I really need help.

He's not single but only toiling with your emotions. With his consistent lies and secrecy in dealing with his baby mama (perhaps the legitimate girlfriend), it's obvious that he's still attached to her and both of them still have something to share together.
My suggestion is for you to kindly bid him goodbye and move on with your life. Personally I find it very difficult to consider a lair especially when it comes to a lifetime decision like a life partner.
Though he's unmarried, he's not emotionally available for the kind of relationship that you desire from him so save yourself from constantly forgiving him and pray for a man who is emotionally available, mentally prepared and spiritually mature for a committed and genuine relationship.


  1. Abeg dear free that guy joor. Why are u guarding him like u r married to him already? Shudnt he go to see his son? Such drama is what u get to experience when there is a son bonding a man and a woman (either married or unmarried). Simply get use to it or rather quit instead of bugging us with unnecessary stuff. Aunty Amara onto the next one joor

  2. Chidi are you the Guy? You are taking it personal

  3. Nne leave the guy alone nah. If u were the 'babymama' won't you pray that u guys become a family?
    Forget his story and pity our fellow babe nah.
    Being a single parent is not easy nah, stop trying to spoil the show and find ur own guy.
    May G-d give u d strength to move on and let them be, Amen.


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