Wednesday, June 1, 2016

Which Church Must we Conduct our Wedding?

Good morning ma'am. How are you doing. Please aunty, is it compulsory for the church wedding to be done in the bride's church or the bride groom's church?
My boyfriend is talking about getting married to me but he said the wedding will be done in his church "Catholic" and I know that can never be possible. That it has to be in my mother's church. "Anglican".
We argued so much that I told him if that's what he wants, that means there won't be any marriage between us. Because my family won't attend the wedding. Please educate me on this issue. Thank you.

Though some families have their own perception and views of where they feel that the wedding should be be conducted, but I will address this from two perspectives.
From the first principle, if a man has paid the dowry of a lady and she's convinced and prepared to grow in love with him for the rest of her life and he has fulfilled all the traditional and family requirements for them to live as man and wife, the man being traditionally the head of the new home is the one who has the sole right to decide where his family should conduct their wedding.
This is because he's the spiritual head of the family and where he chooses to wed maybe where he feels that his family will be groomed in spiritual life.
The alternative to this is where both of you sit down and discuss about your spiritual life, place of worship, perception and your convictions about God and some basic attributes of your spiritual life.
If after due considerations and discussion both of you agree to worship in a particular church or wed in a particular church so that both of you can balance your personal needs and family needs, then both of you will decide on where both of you feel comfortable with.
But I must reiterate that wedding and marriage is not what you do to please your family or friends but a personal journey with your partner,  where you exchange your marriage vows to God in the presence of many witnesses.
If you are not comfortable with his place of worship and he's also not comfortable with your place of worship, and both of you couldn't come to terms with a place where both of you can agree to worship in a particular place, it's not advisable for you to continue with the marriage plans.
If you will struggle with his church, struggle submitting to his authority, struggle balancing his demands with your own needs, and you feel that your partner may not consider your reasons, please reconsider your decision to get married to him.
Where it's your tradition and your partner insist on not compromising on his own decision, kindly move on with your life.
But remember that after traditional wedding, you won't have the right to decide where you feel that you should worship but will seek his approval for you to attend the church of your choice.


  1. Are you getting married to your mum or your fiance? Didn't you know before now that he attended Catholic church. Rubbish

  2. All this primitive reasons people are putting up. Where is the liberalism in Christianity? I was born a Catholic,and my wife and Anglican, but we are both born again but we wedded in Catholic Church. Forget the structure: Catholic and every other Church is just a place of gathering for believers in Christ,but what every believer should be more concerned about should be if the are truly born again. Because if you truly born again, then you should liberal. My people perish for lack of knowledge.

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