Friday, July 29, 2016

I Don't Want to Lose Him but How Long Will I Wait?

Good morning ma, am 27 and my boyfriend is 37 , am a Muslim and he is Christian. We have been dating for four years now and he never proposed. He doesn't have a bank account, I have tried all my best for him to have something in hand as a man and always advice him and it seems may be am forcing him because we work in the same factory, all to no avail and he always play Naija bet..
He met my parent last month, my dad asked him that what are we still waiting for for the past four years now, he said he is still working towards it. Anytime I want to quit, he will call his friends and family to beg me that I must not go, yet he is not serious. My parents asked him if he will allow me to continue with my religion, he said he won't disturb me for that. We love each other so much.
Now my father told him to come with his parent to sign agreement before we can proceed and he never did, still postponing it.. Aunty amara am so confused here thinking about when I will become a mother because people has been asking me if there is any problem with me so that they can find solution to it including my family because I have two suitors that wants me and they have good job. One of them was even disturbing and begging me that he want us to get married next year because ladies always disappoint him. Please ma I really need your advice and that of your fans because am not getting younger and am the first child. Am afraid of getting married to the christian guy so that it won't be a problem in future, as well as the suitors because the devil you know is better than the angel you don't know. Because I don't want to lose the christian guy and for how long will I wait for him again after four years of relationship..
Ma I need your advice as soon as possible because am typing this message with tears

To start with you need to evaluate what you really want in a man and in your marriage so that you don't end up getting married to the very opposite of your heart desire.
You are dating a Christian, the question is what if he refuses to allow you worship in Muslim as you have done in the past, will you be willing to accept his own religion and worship in his church? If you can't, I won't encourage you to continue with the relationship because you will struggle with him in the future.
Secondly, you have been with him for four years but has nothing to show for it, no sense of responsibility, no sense of maturity, no financial capacity, no mental preparedness towards getting married. My question too is for how long will you be willing to wait for him?
He may be your angel but an angel of stagnation and you need a man who is a man and not a liability to your life.
If after four years you can't tell where your relationship is heading to, or tell what how he's preparing for marriage or even tell what he want, I feel that it's wiser to consider terminate the relationship and move on with your life than to hang on with him.
Marriage is not a joke for time wasters but an institution for the responsible for the focused and for those who have purpose and vision in life. So if you need to consider the angels you don't know, please do that and leave the devil that you know because the devil that you are with today was some time an angel you never knew. Lol


  1. All the red flags are showing - what else are you looking for? If you go ahead with this relationship,the tears you are shedding now,will be nothing compared to the one you will shed in future. LOVE IS NOT ENOUGH TO KEEP YOU SAFE. I know you love him,but love without Wisdom,is poison - a suicide pill. Cut your losses now,and save yourself from future pain. Your holding onto things that won't work and crying over things you should be thanking God for,clearly shows your unpreparedness for marriage,eventhough you think you are ready. The key to successful relationships and marriage,is RIGHT KNOWLEDGE. Please,GO AND LEARN....FOR YOUR OWN SAFETY AND HAPPINESS!

  2. Recommended DOWNLOADS to get to clear your confusion:

    *1. The 12 Tests of Love, by Tekena Ikoko
    *2. Who Should I Marry?,by Kingsley Okonkwo
    *3. Destiny Mismatch,by Sam Oye
    *4. Before You Say 'I DO',by Sam Oye
    *5. Before You Say 'I DO'(1,2,3),by Olumide Emmanuel
    *6. Two(2) Kinds of Husbands,by Fela Durotoye
    *7. Is He Into Me,Or Does He Want To Get Into Me,by Steve Harris
    *8. Resolving Conflicts In Relationships,by Poju Oyemade
    *9. Preparing for Marriage,by Tumise Ewedemi
    *10. Finding Your Life Partner,by Joseph Prince
    *11. How To Find True Love,by Pastor Bankie
    *12. The Rules of Engagement,by Ezekiel Atang

    DOWNLOAD@ ‪#Quick‬Downloads™101


  3. I like how u alyz try not to be bias with ur advice irrespective of religion,ethic or class.
    So dear u need to define ur relationship,Luv isn't enough at all. To settle for marriage ooo

  4. I like how u alyz try not to be bias with ur advice irrespective of religion,ethic or class.
    So dear u need to define ur relationship,Luv isn't enough at all. To settle for marriage ooo


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