Monday, July 11, 2016

Scared of my In-laws.

Good morning ma, on the 6th of this month I went to my hubby's site to see what they were doing and to pay the workers, when I got there they told me that someone came there, with what they explained to me I knew it was my brother in law. After some minutes he came and started shouting on me, I was surprised, I couldn't say anything, he told me to leave the site that the house is a family house. I was wondering if he's normal, he picked up a plank and started using it to hit me, he almost broke my right leg. So I picked up my phone to call my husband, he took my phone from me, that was only were I talked to him, I told him to give me my phone that it's not a family phone, the workers took my phone from him, they were all thanking me for not reacting.
So I called my senior brother-in-law(BIL) , my sister-in-law' hubby (SIL) and I called my hubby too to explain what happened. After some minutes my senior BIL and my SIL's hubby came and started quarrelling with him. My hubby has called some boys to come and beat him up, which they came, up till now I have not said anything. The next day my most senior SIL came and asked me what happened, I explained to her and she said sorry, saying they have to hold a family meeting over the behaviour of their brother.
Yesterday I went to where am learning a skill, before I came back my hubby's niece came, she was about leaving when I came back, she jokingly said that my brother-in-law will not only come to the site that he will come to the house and break my leg. I smiled and went inside, my SIL's daughter told me that she will tell me something later and which she did. She said aunty am sure that sister planned it with your BIL.
Ma please I need your advice, am confused and speechless over these issues. My hubby and I are not in Nigeria, I only came home for something, am the type of person that love peace and want peace with my in-laws. Am staying with my SIL, I see her as my mother-in-law, am scared of them all and I don't think I can trust anyone again.

Not all who smile with you is actually happy for your success or your personality. That you are married to your husband doesn't literally mean that all his relatives and friends have all accepted you in their life, and you will be doing yourself a great harm to think or feel that everyone in his family loves you simply because you are married to their brother. 
I have always maintained that all you owe your in-laws is respect and courtesy, while you devote your love, peace and selfless services to your husband and your home. You don't need to impress anyone else, you don't need to make unnecessary friends with your in-laws, you don't need to work so hard to be at peace with them because you have no idea what they're saying against you and you have no idea who is plotting your downfall and who really loves you. 
You can't get into a family and assume that everyone is like your husband, that's a costly assumption and you may end up giving out vital information that they will use against you. 
Be smart and act like a wife that you are. Learn to respect them but try and avoid unnecessary friendships and discussions that has no purpose in your life. I mean who makes such a silly joke with you because you are close to them. 
Trust is earned over time so don't give yours so easily and expect that they will be kind with you. 

1 comment:

  1. Talk with ur husband to set boundaries. He should differentiate btw immediate family projects n extended. Since things are like this, ur projects can be supervised by a trusted friend or ur own family member


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