Monday, April 3, 2017

Should I Plead with Her or Wait for her Response?

Dear Aunty Amara, good morning. 
Aunty, am troubled, like really down. The problem I have is this beautiful lady I intend spending the rest of my life with have anger issues. She confided in me
that her previous relationships were over because of her anger and I promised to help her manage it.
The problem here is that she doesn't take advice, if I tell her to learn how to sometimes not react badly to things, she will flare up and start saying I am mad, am stupid, I should get out, that I should stop talking to her only because I just advised her. Even things that should not be an issue provokes her and she will look like someone possessed when she is angry. Just yesterday, I recommended a book to her to read so that she will learn that anger is not the solution to things, she as usual flared up and said that if I continue telling her about that, that she will call the relationship over. I dared her to do her worst because if I did not tell her the truth, I don't think any other person will and it will certainly block blessings coming her way. She eventually said that it is over, blocked me on Whatsapp and every other communication channel.
Am confused right now, should I beg her or wait to see if she will come to her senses. Please I urgently need your advise. Thanks Ma

Give her some space and time to decide what's best for her. Don't in your bid to help her overcome her weakness allow her to mentally and emotionally manipulate and frustrate your efforts.
Your mail suggests that she's not teachable, and the implication of her attitude is that she may never appreciate your efforts towards helping her control her emotions. 
Are you sure you are emotionally, psychologically and mentally prepared to love your partner with her imperfect personality for the rest of your life? Simply put, can you tolerate or cope with her anger tantrums in your marriage? 
If your love is strong enough to overcome her shortcomings, then you may need to give her some time and hope that she will appreciate your commitment towards helping her become a better lady.

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