Sunday, January 28, 2018

All I Think of now is Suicide!

Aunty Amara good morning, please ma, post my story, I sincerely need your advice ma.
Ma, please, the only thing on my mind now is committing suicide. Ma, my heart is really heavy, I only cry whenever am alone, and I've prayed, I've cried.
Ma, I took in for my boyfriend since last year, and he accepted coming to see my people. He was very caring and loving then, but, now, everything has changed.
He can stay for a whole week without bothering to call or chat me. He doesn't care about me again, each time I ask him about the Introduction, he will always try to avert the discussion.
I don't know my fate right now, I'll be five months by February, I am in my 300 level in school, and I am 21 years of age.
My people will surely chase me out of the house once they get to know that I am pregnant, and I've been begging him to come for the formal Introduction, so that I can move into his house and give birth.
I am scared of my life now, the only thing that comes to my mind now is just to run out of the house and abandon my studies, because once my people notices that I am pregnant without the guy coming, they will surely disown me.
Ma, right now, I don't know what to do, I am confused. Please everybody should also pray for me, that God will make everything perfect, and that God will touch his mind to come for the Introduction.

Take a deep breath, this is not as horrible as you imagine them. Your fears are valid, but you have all you need at this point in your life to take care of your pregnancy and be happy in life. 
When the romance was beautiful, he was caring and lovely, but now that he needs to prove his love for you, his attitude suggests that he doesn't wish to be part of your pregnancy nor does he want to identify with your family. 
The first thing you need to do is be at peace with yourself, remember, pregnancy is not a curse but the result of a beautiful love expressed through sexual intimacy. 
Secondly, remember, you cannot force anyone to take responsibility or do what they don't wish to do. So in your case, I will suggest that you don't put your hope or expectation on him coming for Introduction. 
Thirdly, if there was any way you can communicate your frustration to your parents and they will not chase you away, what will that be? 
If there are individuals who you know that if they talk to your parents, they will always listen to them and heed their suggestions, who will they be? 
All you need now is to figure out the best channel or medium to let your family know your struggles and pregnancy, and then prayerfully inform them of your pregnancy. 
They will definitely be angry, because they have great expectations of you, but they have sacrificed so much in your life to give up on you, or chase you out of their life. 
Once you have found a way to inform your parents, you will definitely receive all the support, motivation, and assistance you need to nurture your pregnancy and give birth to your child. 
Remember, getting pregnant for a man is never a license to marry him, and having a child for a man shouldn't make you feel that you owe him marriage. 
A man may be a good father to his child, but never a good husband to the lady. 
If possible, avoid making marriage decision when you are under pressure, especially this kind of pressure, because you may wake up to realize that your expectation wasn't the true reflection of his personality. 
Suicide will never bring any solution to your pregnancy, nor will it give you another opportunity to learn from your choices, rather it will shut down everything. 
You deserve to live, to learn, and to discover your own realities of life and human existence. 
Take a moment to imagine your dreams, vision, and aspirations in life, is your pregnancy worth killing all of your beautiful plan for yourself? 

This may be a tough moment for you, but always remember that you are stronger than any of life's challenges, and when you channel your energy to the solution that you need, you will receive the insight you need to handle this situation. 


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