Thursday, May 21, 2015

I am tired, I want to call it quits, please advice me.

Good morning Aunty Amara may the good lord bless you.
Please hide my i.d.i will be 33 years old by July am dating a guy of 32 years old though a distance relationship we planned getting married by December this year but the problem now is that he said i should pay him a visit which i accepted.i wanted him to come and see my people he told me that he can't come and see his in-law with an empty hands but i tried to explain to him that money was not the first thing that he should make his intentions known first before talking about money and he flared up.
Now he barely call or pick my calls claiming that am using this as an excuse not to visit him.
Please am tired of this relationship and i want to call it quits please advice me, what do i do?
I love this guy anyway and he has the qualities I need in my man

Dear sender,
You so much sounded like you are the one dating him,and your tone in the mail does not suggest that you respect him as your man.
In as much as money may not be the priority in making his intentions known, you should have been more concerned to know why he said that instead of explaining to him why he must come to declare his intentions.
It may be that he was financially down or that he needed your encouragement which you felt was not necessary.
That you are older than him does not mean you should ride on him and address him as you please.
Accord him the respect that he needs and learn to appreciate him and his views.
Make out time to discuss with him and agree on what is both feasible and workable for your relationship.
Find out what his concerns and fears may be and encourage him to be his best.
If he has the qualities you need in a man, then you also need to equip yourself with the qualities that a man needs to be happy and successful in life.
Only then will you enjoy your relationship with him.


  1. Do what Amara has advised you to do in addition to finding out why he wants you in his place. It is a pity that we are in a world where dating or courtship means co-habitation.

  2. You have to trade with caution seems both of you are not close because his intention might be to sleep with you and tell you story, please seek the face of God and don't show that your desperate for husband or else he will dump you but you have to be prayerful because if he is sincere I believe he will not go to extend of excuses unless your the person who will sponsor the wedding?

  3. Good Advice 4rm Amara. My problem with most Girls now is that all they want is marriage. If your not dancing to their tone about marriage, they would believe you don't love them. Some with bad character, some illiterate, but all with one goal, MARRIAGE.

  4. At 33 you want this thing urgently. He still want to know you better both Physically and Emotionally. The distance between you is not helping matters.
    Give it some time. Don't push it. Let it happen naturally. How will you feel if after seeing you parent he call off the engagement.
    Send a message to him telling him you are sorry, that you can visit him but state your terms like no sex or whatever.


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