Sunday, June 28, 2015

He won't wed me until I give him a child

Gud evening ma I ve being looking 4 a way 2 write 2 you pls help me post dis am in a relationship  with a man of 35 and am 24. For 2 yrs nw we both love each other and he said he is comming 2 marry me by dec de problem is dat he drinks and smoke 2 much and these are de habbits I hate n a man I ve complian 2 him several times 2 stop I ve even threaten 2 leave him he wil only beg 2 stop it but later goes back 2 de same habbit and another tin is dat he said he will do only  traditional marriage ist then white weddn wIl b In a year or 2 yrs time and he is beliving on God 2 give him a child b4 dat time which was nt my plans 4 future becos as a leader n de child I shud live by exmple I wll only get pregnant after my white weddn pls I need u your advise on hw 2 go abt dis pls

Dear Sender,
I just feel you need to sit down and talk to yourself. You also need to work on your self-esteem. When it comes to marriage decision, you should also use your head. You don't like someone smoking and drinking, why manage him? You have decided to manage him hoping to see him change,  I must tell you that it can only get worse in marriage. Okay; you will overlook his shortcomings and marry him, but this same guy is giving conditions for the marriage to happen. He will do just the traditional and then wait to be sure you can give him a child before he does the white wedding. Hmmm, you didn't get the meaning before now right? I just explained to you in simple terms. The guy is just telling you that without you giving him a child, he's not ready to love you.
This said, it's your life and you have the final say.

1 comment:

  1. Hello! It's a great thing you're in love but believe me you wouldn't want to share same house with a smoker and an alcoholic all in one. Apart from the fact that your home MIGHT be messed up, have you thought of the health hazard of both the person person smoking and the person inhaling it? Sorry to say that you might just go into a marriage where you keep running to your inlaws to lay complains.

    On the issue of giving birth before white wedding, please don't let anyone deceive you into carrying a pregnancy you might not like, so first thing first, check well and be sure you can cope with that man before you think of taking him to your parents, because you will be making a mistake if you feel you can talk him out of smoking and drinking in the marriage, so just know that attempting that might fetch you beatings you won't like. Please let your man respect the fact that you wish to get pregnant after your white wedding.
    God bless you as you think twice about what you're about logging in.

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