Sunday, June 14, 2015

Help your spouse; Make a change

Sometimes we complain when what we should simply do is make some changes. I know you put in so much in the career of your spouse. As a wife, you prayed and borrowed for him to get to where he is. As a husband, you paid the bills and sacrificed so much for her to be who she is. 
I hear women and men lament over the treatment meted out on them by their spouse who they started with from scratch. Pastor's wives are not left out. I can authoritatively tell you that so many pastors are ashamed of their wives even when they dish out those sweet words from the altar.
You see your husband struggling and doing everything possible to brush himself up in ministry/career; you see him attending seminars and workshops, you are not bothered because being addressed as 'mummy', wearing heavy laces and gold, and partying every weekend is more important to you than educating yourself and getting better equipped for your new status. 
Sir/Ma, your spouse is not happy that he/she attends the company's annual events without you. Your spouse admires colleagues who are there with their spouses. But it's a formal event where you have people eat with fork and knife; they know how and when to have appetizer and desert while carrying themselves so well. It's a gathering of CEOs and who-is-who of the corporate world. Your spouse wouldn't want to be an object of gossip the week after.
Please stop whining and help your spouse to help you. Brush yourself up. Change the granny hairstyles you wear. Learn how to brighten up your face without looking like a masquerade. Drop the oversized suits you wear and wear something smart even if it's cheap. If you know how to put it together, a $50 dress will look like $5000 on you. Sir, observe and learn how things are done in corporate events.
Make your spouse proud. I know and agree that we should be loyal to our spouse at all times, but I also know we shouldn't be selfish in our relationships. As much as your spouse has to help you, please help him/her. If your husband becomes the company's CEO or even a manager, you should spend less time with your owambe friends and start spending more time with better polished women. What am I not saying? What I am not saying is that you should drop your friends, remain friends, visit when necessary, but interact more with wives of other CEOs who possibly know better.
"Mummy in the Lord", your husband wears suits that make him smart; stop dressing like his mother. Life is about changes. Yours shouldn't be a case of "as it was in the beginning, so shall it ever be". I know your husband is "Angel Gabriel", but I must remind you that he's still attracted to good things and that's why he keeps calling Deaconess A to head programs you should be in control of. Have you wondered why he doesn't call you to welcome his fellow pastors when they first arrive? If he has his way, you won't even cone anywhere close to that guest minister. Brush yourself up. You are a good woman; he knows, but he wants to be proud of you before the world.
As you grow in life, encourage your spouse to grow with you. Don't leave him or her behind only to start complaining when it's late. Carry everyone in your home along.

1 comment:

  1. Hmmm, this is true, it's my case. My husband doesn't want to change even when I try so hard to help him change. I don't know what to do


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