Monday, June 15, 2015

My boyfriend wont define our six years relationship

Good morning! Auntie amara pls I am so so confuse, I need advice  and I don't know what to do. I have been dating my boyfriend for 6years now, we been through so many ups and downs. The problem now is that I have two suitors coming for my hand in marriage but I don't really like any of them. Though I told my mom abt them because am 23years nw , my mom told me to tell my boyfriend about the suitors that are coming my way (she is aware of our relationship). I told him about it (he just started his youth service) when I told him about it, and what are his plan for our relationship, he told me that if I like any of the suitors, I should go ahead, and he is not ready for marriage or even thinking about it now, and that he doesn't know who he is going to marry. I was like it's okay! He flared up, started saying that I shouldn't be telling him things like this because he is still serving and I shouldn't wait for, and I should not put all my eggs in one basket. I was so hurt the way he was talking to me. I know he his not financially okay for marriage but the he was telling me as if I am desperate for marriage, just because I ask him to define our relationship. Is it wrong for me to ask him? Or was I been desperate?. I later told him that since it is like this that we should break up so that I can start a new relationship that with someone that will define our relationship, he said if that is what I want, I should do it but he still interested in the relationship. Please I need ur own personal advice, because I am so confuse, I don't know what next step to take. (He is 29years old).

Dear Sender,
I feel the guy is being very honest with you. You don't expect a young man who is just starting his NYSC to tell you he's going to marry you. He's opened up to you by letting you know he's not thinking of marriage for now as he's more concerned with what to make out of his future. It's up to you. No one will/should make this decision for you. Move on if you feel you should. 


  1. I like guys who say wats on their mind, I knw it hurts to knw d man u love so much isn't ready for marriage, buh wud it ve bn better he lied to u by saying u wait for him and den at d long run won't kip his promises, pls try to endure d hurt, accept one out of d two suitors and learn to love him.....yes veeee says so

    1. This anonymous Veee, loving your comments on this Auntie Amara blog.

    2. Tnx dear m trying, tho nt perfect, I ve my ups and down in my own relatnship, but I learn everyday so as to manage any situation dat comes my way......yes veeee says so

  2. Biko move on. It's rare to see a honest guy like him. The choice finally is urs to wait for an uncertain guy or marry someone who is ready.


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