Wednesday, July 22, 2015

He gave me twenty-four hours to move!

Good morning  Aunty Amara,
Please i want your candid advice. 
He used to come to my friend's Store to drink and we normally chat.
Then later we started a relationship.
We had sex the same day I said yes,because I loved him dearly.
He promised me marriage and we started our marriage plans.
I moved in with him.Then I noticed he was a drunk. 
On several occassions I was the one that brought him back home.
Never knew he drinks to stupor.I threatened to leave him,and he changed.
On my birthday,he engaged me and met with my mum and told her that by October,we would be set.
Then on one Morning,a woman came to our house with a Baby Girl on her back and said the baby is for him.
That they were together before he met me. And we met Oct 1,2014,and she delivered Oct 17th,2014.
I was mad and left the house.I later visited our Pastor and he said I should go back and forgive him.
We lived on fine after that.We moved into a One Bedroom flat, getting set for wedding. 
One day he slept out and I knew he had taken to alcohol again,he didn't come home.
I got so angry and I was to spend the next day with my friend.
He came back in the morning soaked,I just left to my friend's place and didn't come back.
Coming back the next evening,I met blood stains on my bed.
He had brought in a prostitute on her period and laid with her on our bed. 
And that was the second time he was doing such.I refused to forgive him,I packed up my things and invited my friends to help me,when they came,they felt pity for him and asked me to forgive,and I did.
It wasn't even uptow twenty four hours,he started behaving strange and when I inquired from him,he told me to let him be.I did so. 
For two days,we didn't talk,I go out for business and arrive 8pm.
One day,I came home and went to get something in a store nearby,after purchase,I sat down there,lost in thoughts.
Next thing,I saw him going out,I asked him where he was going to? 
He didn't say anything right.I told him we should go home and settle our differences but he refused.
To cut it short,I disgraced him seriously cos I have lost my temper.We got home and fought seriously.
He later left the house and slept out(as usual).
Now he has given me 24 hrs  to leave his house.

Dear sender, 
You don't have sex with a man all because he asked you out. You don't move in to a man's house because he promised you marriage. 
That he has set a date for your wedding doesn't make you married to him. 
I feel those were where you started getting it all wrong. 
I understood that you have been enduring a lot in your relationship which made you to explode by fighting. 
But it doesn't make it right for you to raise your hands on a man. 
Please work on your temper and learn a better way to manage your anger. 
When you  can't take the heat, look for a shade and then return when the sun is down. 
Now that you know what his flaws are, can you really cope with him should you get married to him? 
As a drunkard, womanising is only but a bonus to the feat of drinking so the real question is how long can you put up with it? 
What if he infects you with a sexually transmitted diseases, can you really bear with him? 
You see, everyone has a limit to what they can endure and manage in life and relationship. 
If you know that you can't put up with some of his weaknesses, it's wiser that you remain single and happy than to be married and live a miserable life. 
My suggestion would be that you move out of the house until the right thing is done, that is if you feel He's the best that you can have out there. 
Draw close to God, I'm finding it difficult to believe that some "pastors" will choose to withhold the truth from some people all in the name of encouraging people to marry and possibly make some money from it. 
Please use your knees and God's words much more than you visit the pastors. 
God's word is the true prophesy with no compromise. 
I pray that God will perfect the desires of your heart if you are willing to surrender all to him and wait on him. 


  1. Did you say Prostitutes on their period?

  2. Did you say Prostitutes on their period?

  3. And your pastor told you to go back and continue fornicating with the man. Hey Jesus.
    See what the guy has now reduced you to....fighting, seeing him bring prostitutes when they are menstruating. Tufiakwa. Girls won't reason again as soon as a man mentions the m word

  4. I really have to ask these questions...Woman where is your self worth, where is your dignity, where is your spirit of discernment, why did you throw all these away just because he promised marriage and met your mom? My advice is that you should pack your things and leave his house as he has instructed, stop thinking that you can change him, you have to move on with your life, if he truly loves you, he would've genuinely changed for the sake of the love he has for you, he only found succour in you that's why he promised you marriage, not that he truly loves you. #enoughsaid

  5. Dear Poster, what advice do you need again? You see the sea is rough and you're there waiting for it to swallow you. You have to borrow legs from U Bold and run faster than him moreover you have to go for general txt to know if he has infected you with any virus. #Ella

  6. Na wao, he hasn't married you and u re already living wit him, it shows how desperate u re to settle down, u re starting on a wrong foundation. Pack ur things and live dat house b4 u miss ur ordained life partner, allow God to be the pilot of ur life , u can't do it my ur own strength.

  7. I so much like this development you are already seeing. God has just opened your eyes to see what's needed to be seen. So, just keep seeing and when done kindly make your decision.

  8. 1. A female prostitute also sleeps with her male-customer on the same day. Does that mean she also loves him? Who taught you that about Love? Who wants to wreck your life? Is it you? Your life is at the mercy of your choices. Choose Wisdom,and secure your future. Please,bikokwa! ‪#Quick‬Downloads™101

  9. 2. Don't you read? Have you not heard? Have you not heard that CO-HABITING is a major contributor to divorce,and marriage problems? 85% of couples who co-habited end up in divorce! Is this the kind of mentality you want to enter marriage with,and raise children that will be a curse to the society? Please,re-trace your steps and get it right. Doing the right thing,is for your own SAFETY. ‪#Quick‬Downloads™101


    1. The 12 Tests of Love, by Tekena Ikoko
    2. Who Should I Marry?,by Kingsley Okonkwo
    3. Destiny Mismatch,by Sam Oye
    4. Before You Say 'I DO',by Sam Oye
    5. Before You Say 'I DO'(1,2,3),by Olumide Emmanuel
    6. Two(2) Kinds of Husbands,by Fela Durotoye
    7. Is He Into Me,Or Does He Want To Get Into Me,by Steve Harris
    8. Resolving Conflicts In Relationships,by Poju Oyemade
    9. Preparing for Marriage,by Tumise Ewedemi
    10. Finding Your Life Partner,by Joseph Prince
    11. How To Find True Love,by Pastor Bankie
    12. The Rules of Engagement,by Ezekiel Atang
    13. The Myth of Singleness,by Myles Munroe
    14. The Purpose of Love and Marriage,by Myles Munroe

    DOWNLOAD@ ‪#Quick‬Downloads™101



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