Monday, August 24, 2015

How Do I Deal with Stage Fright?

Hi Aunty Amara, please am in dire need of your help. 
I will be 20 years by December but I have a problem and I will be very glad if it can be solved in which i have tried so many things to make things work out but all to no avail. 
The problem I have is nervousness. Whenever am in the public or even before someone or group of people to either sing, act or give speech, my body trembles. 
My hands, legs begins to shake which is very embarrassing and because of this I have to stop doing things which I can do well just because of my nervousness. 
This thing is really killing me. I feel unhappy whenever i see young people who are doing things confidently. I have gone online and seek advice on what to do but they aren't working. 
I wish to showcase the talent God has given me, I wish to explore but this keep bringing me down. I keep believing in myself but please ma is there any drugs I can use to calm down my nerves? 
Please help me out, I don't want to continue like this. 
I love to see bold people and I want to be one. Thanks. God bless.

Everyone at one point or another experienced what you are currently going through and nobody is immune to some form of nervousness. 
How they manage it is what makes the difference between the courageous and the coward. 
Unfortunately, it's only the confident that is recognised and appreciated by others and not the fearful ones which is why you need to reject every form of fear or low self esteem from your system. 
You need to begin with self appreciation. You need to accept your personality, your passion, your beauty, your features and your desires in life. 
You need to believe so much in yourself that others desire to be like you. 
Nobody will celebrate you much more than you celebrate yourself. People will only appreciate you the way you present yourself. 
If you are the type who walks looking on the ground, people will perceive you as being shy or afraid to look up to their face. 
Another thing that will greatly help you to maintain calm and be confident whenever you are in the presence of others is what I tagged the mirror exercise. 
Get a gigantic mirror in your room, keep in a strategic place and speak to the person that you see inside the screen. 
While you speak to the person, please look into her eyes and pour your heart to her. 
Let her know how much you cherish her and how much you desire to be as confident as she is. 
Speak with all boldness and confidence and gently to her, I'm so certain that she would appreciate your efforts and desire to improve on your communication skills. This should be done continuously at your own discretion. 
When you are called up for any function or you are in the midst of anyone, take a deep breath and relax your system, if you notice that your hands maybe shaking, hold them together with ease and look straight into the eyes of the person in front of you. 
Learn to connect with the eyes of people and not to look downwards or upwards, the moment you lose the eye contact, you will experience nervousness because the other person wouldn't look elsewhere if not into your eyes and that will make you feel shy. 
When you are presenting anything, please slow down, relax your body and mind,breath slowly and with ease and take your time to talk. 
Do not rush what's on your mind because that's a good sign of nervousness. 
If you are singing for example, take charge of the stage in such a way that your congregation will have no option but to follow your lead. 
Because confidence positions you for the world to emulate you, you must learn to master the act of eye contact, helpful distraction and body expression to avoid losing your identity in the congregation. 
Take for example, if you were to lead the praise and worship for a church and you were a bit nervous, you may start by saying can somebody shout a very big hallelujah to the king of Kings, the Lord of Lords, the ancient of days the lion of the tribe of Judah,by the time you must have finished, everyone would be busy either worshipping God or waving their hands or doing something else and then you would compose yourself and direct them to where you desire them to be. 
Finally, it's a gradual process and it's something that improves with time and exposure. 
You cannot be confident by refusing to  do the things that you have the passion for in life or because you fear you may urinate should you stand out in the crowd. 
If you take drugs to be confident, you would end up destroying your body and your mind. 
All you need is a positive mindset and passion for what you do and what you love. 
Then studying motivational books and the Word of God would also boost your understanding and appreciation of your personality. 
Remember that God has not given you the spirit of fear and timidity but the spirit of Boldness, love and a sound mind. 
I see you becoming a great public speaker and I am sure that you would remember your early struggles and laugh at yourself. 
All the best dear. 

How do you manage stage fright? 
Please do share your experiences with me. 
Thanks for your comments on the blog. 


  1. I was once in this situation. Do you know what I did to get over it? I just imagine myself as d only one in the room or on d stage with no audience. I remember when I was in part 1 nd I have to offer a drama course, believe I received the award of the best actress. I will just go on d stage, act as if am in room with nobody looking at me, I don't look at my audience, I act as if they are not present and it worked like magic. I can boldly face any crowd now. Hope my story will help u a little

  2. I will also advise you join a kind of church group or home fellowship were there are no much people then you boldly lead the praise and worship and also participate in reading the scriptures to me that's how I started and today I can stand any were.


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