Thursday, October 22, 2015

Am I Still a Virgin?

Hello ma, please i need your help, I have been keeping this issue to myself for about thirteen years now, but I just need someone to talk to. 
I was raped at the age of 7 by our landlord's son, I was rescued by someone and I told my parents which later resulted into a quarrel and we packed out of that house, but I can't really recall if he penetrated into me before I was rescued, but I know I didn't bleed. 
I'm now 20 years old and I'm confused, I've not had sex since then, am I still a virgin? 
How can I know if I'm still a virgin? I've planned not to have sex until the night of my wedding day. 
Should I tell the person I'm going to get married to when the time comes? I'm really confused, how can I know if my hymen is still intact? 
Thank you. 

Beautiful, I understand why you feel the way you do Its as though virginity is your greatest treasure in life. 
Painful as your experience may have been, I want you to first accept your personality and your beauty as a woman. 
Look beyond the pains and the disappointments of yesterday and choose to be different from your past. 
Your virginity can only be ascertained by physical examination of your vagina by a gynaecologist and only then can we tell whether the hymen was broken or not but beyond the breaking of the hymen is a beauty that cannot be broken by any circumstances and challenges of life. 
Beyond virginity is the your virtues, patience, humility, understanding, wisdom and gentle spirit. 
Beyond virginity is a lady who has the privilege to be a role model for the youths and help save the life and the children of some family who have been abused in one way or another. 
Please do not let the stigma of I'm not a virgin make you feel inferior or disappointed for the things you couldn't change. 
If virginity could save marriage,many wouldn't have considered divorce as an option. Develop yourself and accept your identity irrespective of your experiences at a tender age. 
You are loved irrespective of whether you are a virgin or not and whoever that desires to get married to you should know your experiences and challenges as a young lady but that shouldn't be that you have to open your leg for any man all because the walls of Jewish has fallen down. 
Hold unto God and be positive because God doesn't work with our own blueprint. He will favour you and grant you the very desires of your heart. 


  1. The presence of a Hymen is primarily supposed to be a PHYSICAL SYMBOL of your SEXUAL PURITY, your moral strength,your strength of character,your ability to delay gratification,your self-control,your Wholeness, your foresight and visionariness. Having your hymen intact,without having these qualities intact,is called 'Self-Deception',cos these qualities are the real Virginity; your hymen is only a physical symbol of it. Please, visit ....some helpful materials have been uploaded for you.
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  2. Sorry to hear about what happened to you as a child. I just want to share a friend's story that is similar to yours. Hers happened in the barracks because her dad was in the Police force then. She was really scared when her wedding was around the corner. I don't know if she eventually told her husband before the wedding but I know she is happily married with three beautiful girls. I think you shouldn't bother about the past. It was beyond your control. Focus on keeping yourself chaste till your wedding night. This one is within your control. When you get to the bridge of telling your fiance, you will cross it victoriously. Just make sure you don't go telling every guy who shows interest in you. The only guy you will tell is the one who is coming for your introduction.

  3. Even if your hymen was broken (which I doubt because you didn't bleed), it would have regrown by now after so many years of abstinence. Check it with a mirror.
    If it's intact, don't bother your fiance with that story.


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