Thursday, October 22, 2015

My Parents Are Against His Intentions!

Good afternoon aunty Amara, may God richly Bless you. 
I am into a relationship which we renew recently for about seven months now. Why I used that word "renew" was because this guy and I have dated before in years back but we separated because of many issues but the main thing that set us apart before was my parents. 
This guy was from the same tribe with me in short, the same town my parents and his parents were aware of our relationship but my parents never like me dating this guy which they gave me their reasons that they wanted me to be educated and be somebody better in future. 
They took me out of my town in order for me not to have access to the guy again that was how we separated because there was no means of communication. 
By the  grace of God am a better woman now you know what I mean by using dat word "am a batter woman" I want to settle down, in all the years I have lived away from this guy for over five years I realized I could not stop thinking and missing this guy, all the time suitors have come for me I turned them down because I still thought of the guy. 
One faithful day my phone rang only for me to pick the call and discover it is this guy I was happy and we talked at length that was how we renewed our relationship again am so happy that we were back together but the problem am facing is my parents. 
I went to visit my parents last week to tell them about this guy and his intention to marry me they were very upset and mad at me that all they did to separate us that we were still back together, that they will never permit me to marry him. 
My mum said if he is the one am going to marry then am not ready to marry that word she said shocked me and made me to cry. I told her I love this guy so much that I can't do without him I told her how I have not been into any  other relationship because of my love for this guy. 
My parents reasons were that he was not from a wealthy home and he was from a polygamous home. I tried to talk to my parents to accept my fiance so that he will come for introduction and the marriage they still refused. 
I have to talk to one of our family friends to help me talk to my parents for them to see reasons with me that this guy is my choice and there is nothing they can do or say that will make me change my mind from my decision. 
The family friend man went to meet my parents to help me appeal to them but they refused to calm their mind as well. Mam please what should I do, I need your advice because am confused I love my fiance so much he love me too he is willing to wait till they accept him but am not happy with the whole thing. 
Sorry for the long write up I just wanted you to understand me. Thank you as I wait for your response. 

If you are genuinely convinced of his personality, purpose and vision in life. 
If he possesses the spiritual, emotional, psychological and mental qualities that will help you prosper in your home and live in peace with him. 
If beyond the concerns and worries of your parents, you have taken your time to grow in your knowledge, understanding, and the virtues of his personality and you are prepared emotionally to stand by him, to support him and to help him in your own way to prosper in life and destiny, then you do not need to be worried or perturbed by the opinions of your parents. 
Marriage isn't the ideas of parents but that of God so you cannot allow anyone make the choice of who to get married to for whatsoever reasons best known to them even if they are your blood relatives. 
You only need to apply caution and be patient but remain resolute in your decision and entrust everything to God in prayers. 
In addition to praying and being patient, consult with their pastor or elderly who they must listen to and learn from and table your issue with him or her so that he or she will go out and talk with your parents. 
Please do not fight your parents nor disrespect them but also let them know the consequences of choosing the wrong partner for you and exposing you to vulnerable individuals who may ruin your happiness and fulfilment in life. 
Take things with all wisdom and understanding, buy the favourite gifts of your parents and continue to press on until the wouldn't have any options than to bless you and celebrate with you. 
Your choice of partner affects all areas of your destiny so please be wary and be wise. 

1 comment:

  1. Dear,as much as your parent's reasons are not enough,I have a few questions for you:

    1. How sure are we and you,that the qualities you see in him,are the right qualities to look for in a husband-to-be? Qualities that won't fade and transform him into a 'beast' tomorrow?
    2. How much has he improved in his own life over the last 6-7 years?
    3. How sure are we and you that your obsession with him is not as a result of soul-ties?
    4. How compatible are your Values,Beliefs,Goals,Purposes,Ideologies and Personalities?
    5. Chemistry is good and important,but they are not to be completely trusted when it comes to building blissful marriages and homes that will stand the test of time. They are just chemicals in Tory blood-stream. Be properly guided.
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