Friday, October 30, 2015

Found Out that You Can be Stingy!

Good morning ma. God bless you richly for the works He is using you to do in this page.
Aunty Amara please I need your priceless advice.
I met this guy I love so much last year December and he loves me too. But sometimes his behaviors makes me think otherwise, he finds it difficult to apologies or settle issues once they arises even when he is at fault and sometimes it will last for weeks before we settle and I will be the one to break the silence, apologise and make up with him....
But last month something happened, I was unable to renew his subscription because he was waiting for his call to service and not into any serious business. I received #10,000 salary as an IT student, having problems with my brother that do sponsors my studies just because he got married and changed completely.
So I decided to make some savings to further my studies since no one is willing to support me, though my salary was a peanut and from there I do take care of myself and younger brother in higher institution too.... And all these I explained to this guy I love because I don't hide anything from him but he took it personal and said "I have watched you for sometimes now and found out that you can be very stingy".
I was baffled at this statement tried to recall to him what I've been passing through but he gave a dead ear... And next he started counting all he did for me how many times he subscribed for me and all that, still astonished and speechless at his words he stopped replying my chats.
Called him that same night because I didn't want that to be a problem between us and knowing he was not ready to settle the difference immediately without passing a day but he ignored my calls even the next day.
So I kept calm to let him decide my consequence of discovering that I was stingy in his own definition of STINGINESS to  see how he will handle little crisis like this, as a man am dreaming to be under his protection someday. More so, to see his leadership competence...
And since then, till now Aunty he was nowhere to make up and from the look of things he has moved on with his life not minding about mê and ever since then I wondered what happened to those love he has been proclaiming for me, is this issue big enough to put us apart?
Though sometimes, I buzz him on whatsap and he respond but the chat ends in greeting. Nevertheless, he said he was testing to see my effort as a woman he would go extra mile to help if I could do so for him......
Please Aunty Amara tell me if I was wrong, if I owe him any apology. Even though we wouldn't be together as before at least for the sake of peace, I still love him and wouldn't afford to have him round my world as my enemy.
Please advice us because he is the one that introduced mê to your page, so he is one of your fans.
Please dear thank you!

Little things like this has shattered the heart of many men who were willing to sacrifice their all to support their partner through the tick and thin. 
They simply lost the passion and vision they so much had for the relationship when they realised that the lady he shared his heart with could not give up a token for him in times of need. 
To be frank with you, your partner has the capacity and the capability to get his subscription fee from anyone or anywhere else except you but he chose you because he wanted to know how much you cherish his own needs. 
Take it or leave it, you know so well that your IT money may never be enough for you to meet your needs so what would it have cost you to give up $7.5 (N1500) or less to win his heart for the sake of your relationship and your academics? 
I am not in any way saying that saving your money was a bad idea but the truth is that you made him feel as though he had no place in your heart to have left him without any support when he came to you. 
Think about that, if he had done the same to you, you wouldn't be here seeking for counsel but would have ditched him long time ago, or is it bad for a lady to be caring or concerned of some sort for the man who has been all over her life confessing and proclaiming love to her? 
You should know how you fared in this and make amends where necessary. When you have a partner who is selfless and genuine, please do not take him for granted or make him feel as though he's non human because like he said, it could be a little test that will make a whole lot of difference in your relationship. 
Thankfully he's here so I'll chip in a few words or two for him. 
Dear handsome, I understand how you may have felt as a result of her attitude to you and the relationship. 
If we all continue to see a relationship as a testing ground, many will fake the process, pass the test and destroy your home later. 
This is why it's best to realise the weaknesses of your partner, work on that now and reap the benefits of a refined and adorable lady in your marriage. 
Relationship reveals the not so good aspects of an individual and it takes maturity and wisdom to build a stable and focused relationship without allowing the shortcomings of an individual to hinder your vision for your life and the relationship. 
Handsome, there is no need or place for pride, competitions and ego when you desire a relationship that will stand the test of time. 
You owe your partner sincere and genuine apologies whenever you offend her or do anything that you know wasn't the best for the relationship. 
Scientifically it has not been proven that apologising to a lady reduces the manhood of any man nor has it been confirmed that such a man will lose his personality or reputation as the head of a home and his relationship. 
Competing with your partner will only make your relationship suffocate and hinder your commitment and communication between you and your partner. 
Whenever there is a challenge, it shouldn't last beyond twenty-four hours before you resolve them. 
Please do not be in a haste to leave a relationship because it takes a whole lot more than meeting a new partner to build the kind of relationship and commitment that you desire. 
Always pray for your relationship and invite God in every step of your journey so that you don't take a decision on a temporary circumstances and then regret it later in life. 

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