Wednesday, October 28, 2015

I'm Not Happy, I Want Out!

Good morning Aunty Amara, I am a 31 year old mother of four, married my husband at 23 years old and since then I have lost my peace, for eight years I have not known any peace, and a times there is an argument like me asking for help with the kids or advising him on something he gets angry and for three months or more he will not talk to me and keep malice.
The whole home will be filled with his anger and negative energy and when I ask what is wrong, it will cause more arguments and the next thing he will lay his filthy hands on me like slapping or holding my neck and when that happens I will be so angry and I will say I curse you.
Imagine eleven days after giving birth he held my neck because I touched his phone, six months before then he left for Nigeria with the kids cos he laid hands on my neck and I called police for him, these has continued for too long.
The reason I'm still with him is that, I don't want my kids to be a product of a broken home, but living where the home will not be in peace except for two weeks and the next three months anger, malice over a mere advice or argument he not healthy and the laying of hands makes me so unforgiving.
When he went to Nigeria he brought random girls and slept with them in front of my kids and they told me when they came back, he smokes in the house and I'm so angry, I never knew peace since I met him, having sex with him is ugly never got satisfied by him and he's so fat and can't last for two minutes.
I don't know what to do but I want out but my kids are the most important,I don't want the to grow up like this but I'm not HAPPY, I feel like cheating for all he did to me, violence cheating, malice, kids exposed to his wild life.

That you chose to take some moment off your marriage doesn't make your children a broken children. 
Nobody else needs the safety of life and the peace of mind much more than you do and to think that you are more worried about the opinions of men than you are about your safety gives me many reasons to worry about how much you appreciate your life. 
Marriage go wrong for any reason and for some terrible choices and decisions couples made but to make yourself an object of mass destruction would never bring solutions to the challenges of your marriage. 
Your best decision should be to salvage what is left of the marriage and train your children with love and discipline. 
Children will only turn out to be like the person who trained them and the values that you infused into their innate mind. 
Stop enduring the emotional torture and trauma that your husband constantly dish out to you and pick up the pieces of your life and move if he's no longer interested in the marriage. 
Sometimes you need the courage to believe that your future isn't as horrible as you may have thought it would for you to discover the beauty of what you so much yearned for in life. 
Physical abuse, psychological torture and emotional trauma that your husband has inflicted on you was enough to reduce you to an object of public ridicule or worse still made your children to struggle for the rest of their life. Now is ththe best time to liberate yourself, now is the best moment to to try something different from what you have been told in the past.
Be strong and be willing to give life and freedom another chance to blossom in your heart. 

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