Sunday, October 18, 2015

My Partner is Possessive

Goodevening ma,I do follow your updates and it has helped me in buliding a better relationship with my fiancee,I started dating him few months back,he's 11 years older than I am,I love he's maturity and am in good terms with the family cause I happened to be the lucky person to make him fall in love again after the Ex girlfriend broke he's heart when he found out she was cheating on him with a married man.
He dosent stay here in nigeria but comes back as often as he can cause he runs he's business here in nigeria,recently he started becoming too jealous,requested for my facebook password,I gave him in order to avoid suspictions,he went through my friend list,and started shouting at me asking me what I was doing with all those guys I have on my list,I have quite a number of guys on my list but I have nothing to do with them,at times. I don't even chat them at all,he changed my password and ordered me to open another account he even ordered me to change my line,I did all that without complains,he requested for the password to my new account,I gave it to him,he startd shouting that I have started adding guys to the list again,but the few I added there were those who I learn so much from,few males and some females,but he totally want me to stop talking with guys online and stop adding them too,said I should concentrate on my family,education and him am willing to do all these but I fear the worse,we aint married yet and he's playing dectative,monitoring my every chat on facebook.said I should stop talking with guys,he intends marrying him but am scared of some many things he's trust problems is something else,I don't know if its becos of he's previous relationship.
Please advise me,am so much in love with these guy,he's good all round except for this he's trust and jealousy problems.....should I stop being friends with guys cause of him,he has even stopped me from participating in a group that I am on facebook,cause he thinks I may meet other people through there...I need help..thanks and God bless

Dear Sender,
I am going to be a little bit blunt here. I'm sorry to say this to you, but you are in an abusive relationship. If you can ,please go through this article

Don't get blinded by the 'I love you' talks. It's still morning, please search for a black goat while it's still day. If you get married to this guy, you will never live your life and happiness will be far from you.
You are an adult, a fellow human who must be respected. What you owe him is faithfulness. If at this stage of your relationship he's doing all these, I'm afraid; it can only get worse. Men like this end up being physically violent and with a man like this, there's no future for your career (if you have one).


  1. Dear please do not get to the stage of (chizoba) I went and is still going through that because I felt it was love, with kids involved it's so difficult walking away, I don't have a life, no job no business, I sit at home counting the ceiling till the kids are back from school, I said to myself then he will change when we get married more than 10yrs, it's worst. Like amara said its an abusive relationship. Don't be the story, learn from people's story.

    1. So sorry Ma'am about what you are going through. But is there really NOTHING you can do about the situation?


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