Thursday, October 15, 2015

The Urge For Sex Gets Me Worried!

Good day Aunty Amara,
Please I need a matured advice from you and that of your fans.
My question goes thus – Is it a sin to have sexual feeling as a single?
I am a 26 years old girl but still a virgin. All my life I have always told God that I will remain a virgin until I get married (I am not all that righteous but that was the covenant I took with God years back because of what He did for me).
Even when I was in school, I went into two different relationships but all failed because of my refusal to have sex with them.
Recently, I noticed that my body language has started changing and it is always high whenever I am on my ovulation period.
The urge to be with a man and have sex with him begins to rise up inside my brain during this period. I always try to pray about it but it seems it doesn’t stop. It comes back sometimes after my menstruation.
Sometimes I will be tempted to open pornographic videos and watch a man and a woman having sex.
This is very shameful and each time I see myself in such situation, I go down on my knees and ask God for forgiveness but the feeling comes back after some time especially during my ovulation period.
This has made me to desire to get married soon so that this feeling will go away (although I have not seen my Mr. Right yet).
Please I need answers and advice from matured minds.
I wish you a happy marriage anniversary. I pray God to give me a caring and loving husband like yours very soon.
God bless you and your family.

Mr Right where are you now? Lol. 
Sweetheart, what you experience is perfectly healthy and normal for a lady. 
It is not something to be shameful about or be worried because of what people may have told you. 
During ovulation, the egg is ripe and is patiently waiting for the right man's sperm to fertilise the egg which will result in the formation of a beautiful baby. 
It lasts for about four days and when the right man isn't available, the egg expires and your womb bleeds which is what you call menstruation (even from the name,you will realise that men are responsible for that.. Lol) 
After menstruation, your body begins to prepare another egg for the same process, it's estimated that a woman will release about five hundred eggs in her lifetime(imagine if that was translated into babies.. Hmm) 
You will feel funny especially when you are idle and your mind is focused on the fantasy of being with him and enjoying precious moments with him especially when you are watching sensual movies or a pornographic videos or pictures. 
So whenever you feel like having sex with him, always remember that God has made him and in no distant future, he will be in your village to do the needful and then you can enjoy uncensored pleasure from rightful man. 
Please do not compromise on your convictions or allow any man to discover the beauty of your innocence because it may never keep him there especially when he has tasted the pudding and also you will be hurting God and yourself should you heed to the pressure of your beautiful body. 
Accept the fact that what you experience is completely normal and healthy for you. 
Then engage your mind on things that will enhance your personality, attitude, and virtues as a lady and leave the rest to God. 
And please do not give up or lose hope because he's not with you now, believe God and hold unto His promises for your life and I assure you that you will never regret your decision to wait for your bone, body and blood. 
I am sincerely proud of you and I know that God wouldn't fail you for giving your heart to him. 


  1. Sis Amara has said it all. I have a simple advice for you though as a Christian brother. Whennever you want to give up, look how far you have come. And please, don't complicate matters with watching pornographic videos because they will bear their toil on you. The Scriptures have warned us to, above all else, guard your heart, for everything we do flows from it. (Proverbs 4:23, NIV). I wish you all the best. And mind you, I'm searching too. :-)

  2. We can be friends. Your Mr. Right maybe..

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  4. Ha madam after the age of 24 there is no usefulness in being a Virgin any more.Pls find a man that u are attracted to and have protected sex with him..No one knows tomorrow, u may die a Virgin..What virginity is a 34 yr old unmarried woman protecting if she has a man she loves and they are not yet ready.Your natural instincts are telling you its time so , take it..There is nothing wrong with safe sex, virginity is overrated..

    1. you can't be serious and where did you get such decietful idea from,you better rebuke that demon from yourself,so you don't draw the anger of God on yourself

    2. Because you lost your virginity at age 5 does not make it worthless or non-valuable. At least the lady is a trustworthy individual that had kept the temple of God holy.

  5. I disagree with tayokarate
    everything is wrong with "safe sex" outside marriage
    as instituted by God the Almighty. People like this ought
    to be encouraged to keep it as long as they find their Mr. right
    and not otherwise.

    My sister start to prepare for marriage because your husband
    will supernaturally locatr you soonest. It is well with you.

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  8. wishing I could be her Mr right right now but in all righteousness it wouldnot be right to write those word in my hand writing right here.

  9. my dear,i completely understand how u feel because i was once in ur shoes.Please dont allow anyone decieve u into thinking that ur decision is worthless. I got married at d age of 29 and was a virgin till after my wedding. And i will forever be grateful to God for that decision i took and for His grace that saw me through. Forget about those men that have came and gone due to ur refusal to sleep wit them. Any man who genuinely loves u will only encourage u to keep to ur vow; and will be in a hurry to do d needful so as to have u all to himself. Just try as much as possible to keep urself busy positively. Read good motivational books and attend ur church's activities especially those periods u feel that d urge is higher.
    Please DO NOT seek peoples opinion on that because many will discourage u out of jelousy.

  10. Keep it up,young lady. Having sex will not prevent a man from leaving you later on. Each man who sleeps with you reduces the pool of potential spouses for both of you and your families because you can't marry his relative and he can't marry your relative. The more sex partners you have, the more no-go areas you have.

  11. Thank you for this valuable and informative post share.I learn many things like Sex Addiction Recovery For Life.There is also Sex addiction treatment in New York which is also informative.


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