Monday, November 23, 2015

How Do I Move On From Here?

Hello Aunty Amara, thank you for all you do, I have been an avid reader, please I need your advice.
My story is a long one, I was raised by my dad and step mum, I never knew my mum and my dad died when I was 5, my siblings and I were raised by my step mum, I would say we have lived in peace, she never let us go out, even when we talk to people she would ask us what we were talking about.
I remembered when my friends called me, she would be on the second house phone listening to our conversation, when I realised this I stopped giving out our phone number.
She has done well for us, she took my brother and I to the UK, and her own niece and nephew, things went bad, she lost her job so I had to be the breadwinner, thus affected my education.
When my friends were enjoying life I was worrying about how to pay bills etc, I never dated or anything and she has never really asked me if I was dating. I remembered one night I was talking to my friend on the phone and she came down screaming, she was asking me if I was normal etc.
Fast forward to 2014, her niece was now dating , which she doesn't have a problem with, I don't know what I have done to this girl but one day I came back and heard them talking about me, insulting me and this has brought friction to the family.
Now I realised that my step mum is encouraging the girl to get married, she has left home for university, and a pastor told my sister that my step mum has tied us up as slaves.
I want to move out but I don't want her to feel like I am not grateful, what do I do?

My love, 
No matter how much anyone may love you or care about you or support you, a time will come when you just need to take a leap of faith and seek the face of God for direction and self discovery. 
Abraham had to listen to God and heed his call for his destiny even when it may not have made sense to him then. 
So you don't need to feel ill treated or pained by the attitude of your step mum because in all fairness she has done what was within her capacity to do which was to support you when you had nobody else nor had any idea what life truly entails. 
Appreciate her irrespective of her attitude or perception lately. Respect her decision and prepare yourself for your future. Work and save some funds so that you can cater for your needs and that of your brother. 
Use this opportunity to equip yourself with the necessary attitudes and skills that you may need at some time in your journey. 
Remember that you are never in any competition with anyone else but your future and your identity. 
Hand everything to God in prayers and meditate on his word for direction and the comfort of the Holy Spirit. 
When you are set to leave, kindly let your step mum know your intentions and then appreciate her before bidding her goodbye. 
You may decide to buy her a gift or simply do that with soothing words to show your appreciation but never you leave without forgiving her of anything that you feel that she never did to please you but forgive her and remember that she's only human with shortcomings so that God will prosper you in all your endeavours. 


  1. How old are you? And do you want stay close her forever or. If your life is a lemon so make it out lemonade my dear just use mind and run to God only one is able to help you without any coins. Good luck

  2. Good evening Ma...have sent Mail twice to ur mailbox but u didn't reply. Is there anyother way to get to you i can only comment but cant share..Thanks


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