Monday, November 16, 2015

I Don't want to Regret my Marriage!

Good day aunty Amy, Happy Sunday to you. Sorry my story will be a little lengthy but just really need your advice.
I will be 24 by next year January , I met a guy seven years ago immediately after my secondary school. The guy is 29 years now, he asked for a relationship which I later accepted and we dated for a year, though it was a long distance relationship because we were not in the same state and then I was not opportuned to go out but through out the whole year the communication was wonderful.
Later on I met another guy in my town in which the guy discouraged me to quit with my first guy and I also accepted due to the distance, though the guy never wanted me to go but I had to let go because I saw someone else.
Now the problem is that the guy is back now pleading and wants me back but I'm still with the other guy.
I've been to some places to pray about it and they all told me that the first guy is the right man for me. I also had an encounter with God personally in which He revealed some things to me.
The illustration in the dream was like me carrying a chair outside the house and later carried it inside and it continued like that with the second guy but there's nothing like that with the first guy that came back begging.
Aunty I'm just confused and don't want to regret maritally, please I need your advice because the second guy is facing some problems now and I don't want him to see it as if I left him because of that.
Sorry for my lengthy story, still had to make it short. Thanks ma

My love, that's not what relationship and love is all about and am afraid that if you should continue in this manner, you will not only end up with the wrong partner but will be frustrated for the rest of your marriage. 
At the age of 24 years you should quit desiring a relationship of convenience and commit yourself to building the kind of relationship that will last for a lifetime. 
You need to look inwards and ask yourself what you can offer to build a resilient and prosperous relationship and how your presence will enhance the quality of life of your partner. 
You need to stop looking for what you will gain and also consider what your partner needs in life. 
The simple truth from your mail is that you are a fair weather lady who is confused about what he needs in a relationship and who she is in life. 
That you had a dream and coincidentally you saw yourself carrying out a chair or that a pastor prayed and mentioned his name to me doesn't necessarily mean that such an individual is the one God has prepared for your destiny. 
If you desire to hear from God clearly, then you must work in accordance with his principles and destroy every form of idol in your heart. 
You must learn to adapt to some unfavourable circumstances in your relationship like long distance relationship or a times when things may not be as favorable or flashy as you desired them to be. 
You need to be in the right standing with God in order to hear his voice and that you can do by giving your heart to him and surrendering your will to him. 
When you do that, it would not be confusing or complicated for you to discern the voice of God from the voice of your emotions. 
Take your time and if possible please do not commit yourself to any of them so that you can hear yourself and also discern what God is saying concerning your life partner. 
Great men don't fall from trees but they go through testing and trying times holding unto God with the support of those who truly believed in them and encouraged them in times of despair and they held on till the dawn of their glory. 
So please work on your perception of relationship and marriage so that you don't make a mess of God's provision for your destiny. 


  1. You're young to choose one between those both men my dear just run to God Who is going to help you to take a right one keep on to pray watch.

  2. Dear poster..
    Leaving a guy you were in good terms with just because another guy urged you to do so out of his selfish interest simply shows that you're not ready for a still have a long way to go..
    You don't just toil with peoples emotions like that..The end result has now're now confused..
    For you to have left the other guy just because the nearer guy told you to do so shows you do not love any of them and I'll advice you to desist from choosing between people you feel no love for because there is every tendency that you'll walk out again once you find someone better..
    It's not about carrying a chair up and down in your dream...Anybody can do that..
    Wake up and face reality..Do not stick with a partner out of pity..


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