Thursday, November 19, 2015

My Husband has Never been Faithful!

Good evening Aunty Amara,Aunty I need your help.
But firstly I would like to ask you this question before I go ahead with what is bordering me why is it that most men hardly stick to their wife in marriages?
I have been married for eleven months now but since the beginning of my marriage my husband has never been faithful.
When I confronted him, he told me to recall what our M.C told me about men and marriage so I did( he said that most men do cheat all through their first three years of marriage).
Then he went ahead to tell me that are I not aware that there are other girls he was with before he then decided to marry me?
He even went ahead to say that why he married me was for no other reason than because I told him that my uncle was among the head of one of the top banks in Nigeria and has promised to fix me immediately I graduate,but up till now nothing has been done.
He also said that is only that job that will make him not to give up on me since I haven't been able to conceive since this eleven months.
Aunty am confused cos am feeling like am losing the man I loved and stood by even when my father objected to marry him that I was able to convince him to accept him as an in law.
What do I do now? Is not that my uncle has turned off from his promises but he asked me to acquire a professional certificate,I sat for the exam last month but the certificate will be out by January next year.

Sweetheart, remind your husband of what the pastor said and even what your father said the very day he came asking for your hands in marriage. 
Your pastor before the congregation asked him "if he will take you as his lawfully wedded wife to cherish and to hold, in sickness and in health including times when babies are not forthcoming, in good times and in not so great times, in riches and in great poverty FORSAKING ALL OTHER GIRLS, LADIES AND PROSTITUTES INCLUDING THE ONES HE MET AFTER WEDDING AND BEFORE MEETING YOU until death do you part? "
Remind him that the pastor said that before MC expressed his opinions during reception so if he's really keen on doing what his MC said then he should be ready to receive the reward from God to whom he vowed with his life in the presence of all.
Men are unfaithful simply because they chose not to be faithful, just like your husband rightly said that he decided to settle the girlfriends he acquired before wedding you and have chosen to work with his Mc and not God's word. 
It's obvious that he doesn't love you for who you are but loved you for what he can gain from you and how he can use you to gain the world and probably do away with you. 
It's too late for you to regret and too early for you to give up. 
It's time for you to pray that God will resurrect his dead conscience and help him to realise who he is in Christ Jesus. 
Pray that God will help him to be responsible and fight as a soldier of the cross for your home. 
Pray for him and continue to intercede on his behalf holding him and praying for every unpleasant thing in your marriage.
It's obvious that he's not emotionally mature to give his heart and support to the marriage and for him to have defended his attitude shows that spiritually he's pretty far from God's word. 
This is why you must be willing to go the extra mile to pray and stand in the gap for him. 
As regards your pregnancy difficulties, it's pretty too early for you to infuse pressure and worries on your system. 
Spend some quality time with your husband, relax your mind and body and enjoy the benefits of good quality sex with him. 
Try positions that gives him greater penetrative advantage so that when he ejaculates, it doesn't land on the floor. 
You may use pillow on your buttocks to raise your buttocks and also stay for a while to avoid the sperm from leaving your body after intercourse. 
Also you and your husband may visit your doctor to examine your body and ascertain the state of your your womb and his penis and also the sperm so that you don't keep trying out when the sperm may not be able to get you pregnant or your hormones isn't helping the sperm to adapt inside your womb.
This is time for you to organise yourself and work on your home because there's a huge work to be done. 
Please entrust everything to God who knows what you truly need at this point in your marriage.


  1. Our headmaster is talking with a good maturity and wisdom,we can't say anything else. Be blessed also pray for your husband my dear only God is able to solve your marriage issues.

  2. I think what she meant by M.C was "marriage counselor". Although I wonder what kind of counselor would tell a couple that kind of thing, does that mean cheating is now appropriate to the extent of being justified to be a norm? #sighs. May the Lord have mercy on us.

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  4. I even fear for the lady because I don't know if her health would be safe having unprotected sex with him owing to do fact that he cheats and might possibly be having unprotected sex outside. She needs to be careful and get him to go for a test(even though I know it'll be difficult owing to the fact that he feels no remorse over what he is doing) in order not to severe the situation coz sexually transmitted diseases could also hinder child birth and also cause great harm to your health.


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