Tuesday, January 12, 2016

Am I Too Young to be in a Relationship?

Hi good day ma compliments of the season. I'm 22 years a part student of Unilag (300 level)and I'm into a relationship with a guy of 33 years I've been with him for four years now, he is kind, caring, supporting,and God fearing. We love each other so much but the issue now is that he has been pressurizing me that he wants me to introduce him to my parents which I know is the right thing to do but I don't know how to go about it because my father said he does not like Yoruba people and my guy is from Ondo state while I'm from delta(though I was born in Lagos and can speak Yoruba fluently).
My mum do see the guy around me cos he comes to our shop and I guess she knows what is going on but she is pretending as if she does not know, he even came to our house on Christmas day(though she has asked me five years ago who the guy was to me cos he comes everyday but then I said he was just a friend to me cos he has not proposed to me then.
Ever since then she has not asked me again ma ,aunty Amy please o am I too small to get married or to be in a relationship? Please help me I don't know how to go about it I'm even scared to tell her, me and my mum discusses but she has not even for one day talked or asked me about my marital journey or if I'm even into a relationship. My guy said I should tell my mum first but I don't know where to start from I don't know what would happen and I'm the only daughter she has.
My guy is becoming sad about this issue,he is the one I love not that I have not seen Igbo guys or a guy from Delta. The relationship has been a peaceful one he said it's like I'm not serious with him, he said I should tell my mum as soon as possible what would I do ma? Thanks in anticipation and sorry ma for the long write up?

At your age you are mature enough to be in a relationship with the man that you love and it is your responsibility to tell your mother when your partner changed from "just a friend" to a loving fiancé. Your mum won't start asking you everyday to introduce your friend to her because she believes that you are responsible enough and sincere enough to open up and let her know what's going on in your life and relationship.
She was once a young girl like you so she will understand you when you confide in her and let her know how much you love your fiancé.
Begin with your mother and gradually involve your father when he's ready for the introduction. Tell her about your journey with your partner and your convictions about his personality, his source of living and his purpose in life.
When you are done, listen to her views and avoid making any argument with her for any reason. She may not be so comfortable but it's normal to feel bad when your child is going far away from the family but it doesn't in any way mean that they will stop you.
Stop being afraid and take the bold step and let your mother know what's going on in your life, then we can tell of what she makes of his personality and vision for you. As for your dad, once your mum is convinced, your dad will be there to bless your marriage.

1 comment:

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